Going out alone can be intimidating, even scary. Many feel insecure or unsafe when they go out alone, whether it's for a trip or just to go to a party. Feeling insecure can prevent you from having a carefree fun or even completely hold you back from going out. So how do you go out alone and feel confident and safe all the time? Read on to find out.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Get to the Place
Step 1. Let someone know where you are going and how long you plan to be there
This does not mean compromising your "style". Telling a family member or friend where and when to start looking for you and worrying if it helps is a smart move. You don't need to get a GPS tracker, but it's smart to give a friend or parent a MapQuest or Google map of your planned route so they know where to look for you if you don't show up. Knowing that you have taken these simple precautions can dramatically increase your sense of security.
- Before you go out to meet your friends, call or text them to let them know you're on your way, so they know that if you don't arrive, it's because something happened.
- When you arrive, let a friend or parent know that you arrived safely.
Step 2. Make sure your car is in good condition if you have to drive
If you have to drive to go somewhere on your own, make sure you have a spare tire in case you need it and that no dashboard lights are on before you leave. You should also carry an ACI or other card with you for emergency roadside assistance, and a charged cell phone. Fill up before you leave.
Just checking that everything is okay before you leave is a big step to move with peace of mind
Step 3. Park the car in a safe place
Before getting out of the car, think about where you parked. Is it well lit and easy to see from the street? It is the best place to park if you are alone. Avoid parking in dark alleys or very far from your destination. Remember where you parked, it is very important. Mentally follow the path until you reach the door of the place where you are going; watch out for anyone on the street and collect your belongings quickly.
- Before leaving the car, carefully check that you have closed it and that you have not left anything attractive (such as a laptop bag or an iPad) in sight. Don't wander around, walk decisively directly to the door and enter immediately.
- Hanging out on the street is not a good idea, as it allows potential attackers to notice that you are alone. Keep in mind whoever you may notice on the street and follow them from the corner of your eye if possible.
Step 4. Take a well-lit street when on foot
Even if you are in a relatively safe neighborhood, and even more so if not, you should find the main and best-lit street. If you are walking down a dark alley or if you find yourself in the middle of a dark residential street, you are more likely to be robbed if no one is around. A well-lit path will help you see where you are going and discourage bad guys from coming towards you. Here are some additional tips to follow if you are on foot:
- Don't put your headphones on and don't keep checking your cell phone messages. Be alert.
- Walk in the opposite direction of the traffic flow so that a kidnapper is less likely to load you into his car.
- Know where you are going before you leave home. If you constantly check the map on your mobile, you will only make yourself an easy target.
- If you are out and about alone in the dark, this is not a good time to stop and withdraw money from the ATM.
Step 5. Learn how to stand up for yourself
It's important to remember that you don't have to suddenly become a karate black belt or carry a knife, but if you are generally confident when you go out alone, knowing that you can take care of yourself can greatly reassure you. Exercise your senses so that you get the feeling that you are in control - try to keep yourself alert at all times, so that you are able to determine if something is going to happen.
- If you travel, or live in dangerous or risky areas, learn how to block a punch or think of a way to avoid harmful accidents.
- Being able to have a "street" attitude might seem silly or pointless, but simply knowing that you can stand up for yourself will increase your confidence.
Method 2 of 3: How to behave when you arrive at your destination
Step 1. Don't share too much personal information with someone you just met
While making new friends is part of the fun of dating, you should avoid giving too much personal information to a person you just met, unless that person is trustworthy - for example, if they are the best friend of one of your best friends. But even in this case, be on your guard. Don't mention that you came alone. Let them know that you are waiting for your friends or that someone will soon be picking you up.
- If you meet someone you like, make arrangements to meet them in a cafe, restaurant or amusement park, instead of letting them know your home address or place where you work.
- Don't say exactly where you live, not even in passing.
- It's okay to give your mobile number if that's what you want. The fundamental principle is that you take some time to really get to know someone and get in touch with them by understanding how they really are, not just based on the first impression.
Step 2. Stay alert, but don't be paranoid
Remember that good people are like sunny days, there are many. Just because you're cautious doesn't mean you need to be afraid that everyone is out there thinking about how to screw you. Be ready - not paranoid. It is useful to remember that there are more sunny days than those in which lightning strikes. Lightning strikes are dangerous, in some cases fatal, but rare.
Step 3. Show others that you are enjoying yourself
If you want to be safe and not become a target, have a good time, whether you are with your friends or alone. Others are less likely to take advantage of you if you give the impression of being the life of the party instead of staying in a corner alone. And remember to relax when you are in a safe environment, you will not have fun otherwise. Once you arrive at your destination, adapt to the situation and decide to have fun at all costs.
Method 3 of 3: Go Home
Step 1. Take a taxi home if you are drunk
Remember that there is no other driver, you have to drive. Be aware of what you drink. Don't leave your drink unattended for any reason. If someone offers you a drink, be sure to see the bartender pouring a drink. If you suspect your soda has been tampered with, DO NOT drink it. Do not get drunk. If you get drunk, don't think about going home without calling a taxi or a relative to pick you up.
Just a reminder: if you're out and about completely alone, it's not a good idea to get too drunk or someone will take advantage of you. If, on the other hand, you are going out to meet up with friends, that's fine
Step 2. Quickly walk back to the car if you can drive home safely
Thoroughly scan the road and head straight to your car, and then home. Alone. If the attendant or the bouncer or a group of other women you met offers to accompany you to the car, accept the offer. At the very least, tell someone that you are going home and ask them to watch you until you get in the car.
- Take a look around to find out who is traveling the road with you, and if you see an alley between you and your car, walk in the middle of the road if necessary, so that you have plenty of space to move around if necessary.
- Walk towards the car with decision and safety and when you arrive, keep the keys close at hand and open the car when you are close. As you approach the car, quickly check that there is no one inside. Go inside, put the safety on immediately, fasten your seat belt, start the engine and go. Don't sit in the car to fix your makeup, play with your iPad or text someone, go.
Advice
- Many assaults, car thefts, robberies and homicide attacks are committed against women sitting in cars while struggling with money, make-up or the radio. Often the doors are not locked and the attacker simply slips inside the car. Don't become this kind of target. Instead, gather your belongings, lock yourself in, buckle up and go on your way. You can fiddle with the iPod at the next red light.
- Those who want to rob or attack someone often look for easy targets, nervous, reserved types or people who wander without paying attention to their surroundings. Flaunting confidence and walking decisively makes you appear confident and not an easy target.
- Dressing up sexy and flirty or wearing a lot of jewelry might be cool once you're inside, but before you reach your destination, it won't attract the kind of attention you want. Make sure you cover up before you get to your destination and when you leave.
- Consider creating an emergency kit for the car. Having a tire repair kit, engine oil, brake fluid and automatic transmission fluid (which in many cars can also be used as power steering fluid) can be a lifesaver overnight.
- Don't forget to bring the pepper sting spray with you. It is legal if it complies with ministerial regulations and is easy to buy on sites like eBay. It is also available in a mini version to hang on the key ring.
- Other great tools for an emergency kit include an emergency blanket, a survival knife with a properly sized blade, a windshield shredder, a seat belt cutter, a hand-wound flashlight, and a few lightsticks.
Warnings
- If you have bad feelings about the neighborhood, you should avoid all stairs, elevators and garages.
- Take a look at the back seat of your car as you approach; it is highly unlikely that anyone is inside the locked car, but it will make you feel safer when you are alone KNOWING that you are alone.
- Avoid carrying items that you cannot afford to lose.
- If you feel like someone is chasing you, don't go home. Doing so would let those who follow you know where you live. Head to the police station or an area where there are many potential witnesses if something should happen.
- Don't count the money on the street, it's an invitation to be robbed. Be alert and do not get distracted when you are on the street.
- Don't get distracted when you are alone. Remember that you have to rely only on yourself. Be alert and always maintain full possession of your faculties.
