While crying is the natural consequence of certain emotions and the most understandable reaction expected at many moments in life, you may find yourself in a situation where it is inappropriate or inappropriate to show yourself in tears. It may also be that someone is crying and you want to help them calm down. Whatever the circumstances, there are several physical and psychological tricks that can help you stop crying.
Steps
Method 1 of 5: Avoid Crying with Physical Gimmicks
Step 1. Try blinking or not closing them at all
Some people, by blinking their eyelids rapidly and repeatedly, are able to distribute the tears in the eyes and have them reabsorbed into the tear duct, preventing them from accumulating. On the contrary, other people, not blinking and keeping their eyes open, hinder the formation of tears thanks to the contraction of the periocular muscles. Only by practicing will you find out which technique is best for you.
Step 2. Pinch your nose
Since the tear ducts start from the nose and into the eyelids, squeezing the bridge of the nose and the septum as you close your eyes will block the tear ducts. This method works best if you use it before the tears begin to flow.
Step 3. Smile
Studies have shown that smiling positively affects emotional health, but also the way others see you. What's more, it hinders the symptoms associated with crying, making it easier for you to shed tears.
Step 4. Refresh yourself
To contain the strongest and most unpleasant emotions, try washing your face with cool water. Not only will you calm down, but you will be able to regain your energy and regain focus. You can also put your wrists under cold water and dab them behind the ears. In these points pass the main arteries just below the surface of the skin, so by cooling them, you will achieve a calming effect on the whole body.
Step 5. Have some tea
Research has shown that green tea contains L-theanine, a molecule that promotes relaxation and reduces tension, but also increases control and concentration. The next time you feel upset and want to cry, treat yourself to a cup of green tea.
Step 6. Laugh
Laughter is a simple and inexpensive "medicine" that can improve general health and mitigate the feelings that cause crying or depression. So, find something that makes you laugh and cheers you up.
Step 7. Try progressive relaxation
Often we cry after a long moment of tension. This is a reaction that allows the body to relax tight muscles and calm the mind. It is also a cognitive activity, because it teaches us to recognize how the body feels when we are upset and tense compared to when we are relaxed and calm. Starting with your toes, start contracting the various muscle groups, one at a time, at 30-second intervals, slowly moving towards your head. This exercise is also useful for relieving insomnia and relaxing after restless sleep.
Step 8. Take back control
Some studies suggest that the sense of helplessness and passivity often causes manifestations of crying. To avoid these situations, try to get in motion physically, perhaps by getting up and walking around the room, or by opening and closing your hands with a light pressure that involves the muscles, so that you remind the body that what you do depends on your will and, therefore, you have everything under control..
Step 9. Use the pain to distract yourself
Physical pain hinders the activity of the senses that produce emotional pain, preventing you from crying. You can pinch yourself (for example, between your thumb and forefinger or behind your upper arm), bite your tongue, or pull leg hair through your trouser pockets.
If you hurt yourself so badly that you bruise or otherwise injure yourself, it is best to stop and try another method
Step 10. Take a step back
Physically remove yourself from the situation. If you feel like crying in the middle of an argument, politely leave for a few seconds. It is not a way to escape from the problem. However, as you walk away, you will have the opportunity to focus on your emotions and eliminate the threat of an impending confrontation. In these moments, practice some techniques that prevent you from crying as you walk back into the room to continue the discussion. The goal is to regain control of your emotions.
Method 2 of 5: Avoid Crying by Using Mental Exercises
Step 1. Postpone crying
To regain control of emotional reactions, when you feel like you are about to cry, tell yourself that you can't at that moment, but that you can let off steam later. Take a deep breath and try to lessen the heightened emotions that make you cry. While it may be difficult at first, over time you will be able to hold back the tears at the least opportune moments, rationally identifying your feelings and conditioning your body to react appropriately at the right times.
Understand that it is never a good idea to avoid crying altogether, as repressing this reaction can cause emotional damage, aggravating the symptoms of anxiety and depression. Remember to find ways to express your emotions
Step 2. Meditate
Meditation is an ancient method that reduces stress, fights depression and relieves anxiety. It is not necessary to go to a teacher to benefit from meditation practice. Just find a quiet place, close your eyes and focus on your breath, inhaling and exhaling in a deep, long, slow and measured way. You will notice that the negative feelings will disappear almost immediately.
Step 3. Try to distract your mind
Find something to focus on to forget negative emotions. Think of something that makes you happy or makes you laugh. Watch funny animal videos on the internet. You can also try to commit to something you are eager to do. If you love solving problems, do some math equations or work on a small project. If these solutions don't work, imagine a relaxing place that calms you down. Give your mind a chance to focus on details that can give you a pinch of joy. This exercise will force the mind to experience emotions other than sadness, anger or fear.
Step 4. Listen to some music
Music has several benefits that allow you to manage stress. If it's relaxing, it can calm you down. If the text relates to how you feel, it can make you feel better and reassure you. Choose the right songs according to the situation and ward off tears with a well-assorted lineup of songs.
Step 5. Raise your awareness
Focus on yourself, on the way you taste what you eat, on how you feel the wind on your skin, on the way you feel the sensation of the fabrics as you move. When you focus on the present and pay attention to your senses, you can relieve mental stress and realize that the problem is not insurmountable at all.
Step 6. Be grateful
We often cry because we feel overwhelmed by what we consider negative in our life or by the obstacles we are forced to face. In these cases, take a deep breath and you will see that the problem to be solved is less serious compared to other difficulties that you will probably have to overcome or have gone through in the past. Remind yourself of all the good things you are grateful for. Keep a diary so you don't forget how lucky you are and to be able to face the most difficult times.
Method 3 of 5: Coping with What Makes You Cry
Step 1. Identify the cause
Can your urge to cry be associated with certain emotions, situations, people or anxieties of various kinds? Is what it comes from something you can lessen contact with?
- If the answer is "yes," find a way to avoid or reduce contact with what makes you cry. For example, you might just avoid talking too long with a coworker who hurts your feelings or watching sad or violent movies.
- If the answer is "no", consider going to a therapist to learn some techniques to handle various situations. This solution is especially indicated when the conflict is located in the family context or in the circle of loved ones and is presented as the root from which all the negative emotions that cause you to cry arise.
Step 2. Recognize emotions as they arise
While it's helpful to be distracted when you feel like crying at inopportune moments, take the time to listen to your emotions when you are in a quiet, secluded place. Do some introspection, analyzing what you feel, the causes and possible solutions. If you intend to recover and get better, it is counterproductive to ignore what is bothering you or try to constantly repress it. In fact, recurring problems can settle in the unconscious and lead you to cry more frequently.
Step 3. Take stock of the best things in your life
Get in the habit of controlling negative thoughts and remembering the positive things around you. If you have the option, make sure that every negative thought comes with another positive. Not only will you be more serene, but you will also prevent sudden and unpredictable emotions from manifesting by training your mind to convince yourself that, despite all the problems, you are a worthy person.
Step 4. Keep a journal to understand what triggers your crying
If you have trouble controlling your tears or don't know why you cry, you may be able to trace the root of your distress by keeping a journal. This exercise can have beneficial effects on your health, help you see the positives of a stressful situation, and clear up everything you think and feel. By describing the feelings related to anger or sadness, you will have the opportunity to lessen the severity of these feelings and, consequently, to rein in the tears. You will also be able to get to know yourself better, gain more self-confidence, and be more aware of negative situations or people you should be eliminating from your life.
- Try writing for 20 minutes a day, every day. Practice writing freely, without worrying about spelling, punctuation, or other grammar rules. Write quickly without censoring yourself. You will be amazed at what you can learn about yourself and how much better you will feel.
- The diary will allow you to sincerely express what you feel, without judgments or inhibitions of any kind.
- If you've been through a traumatic event, it can help you rework your feelings and give you more control over yourself. Describe what happened and the emotions you felt to reap the full benefits of this exercise.
Step 5. Get help
If you have the impression that nothing is helping to curb tears and negative emotions, and it seems to you that this situation is affecting your relationships or work, start finding a solution by contacting a therapist. Often the problem can be solved with behavioral psychotherapy. Also, if your problem is medically motivated, a therapist can point you to the most appropriate medications.
- If you have depressive symptoms, seek help from a psychoanalyst or mental health professional. Symptoms of depression include: persistent feeling of "emptiness" or sadness; sense of hopelessness; sense of guilt and / or uselessness; suicidal thoughts; loss of energy; difficulty sleeping or hypersomnia; changes in appetite and / or weight.
- If you have suicidal thoughts, get help right away. Try calling the help line for suicide risk prevention which answers the call center 331.87.68.950, or visit the Telefono Amico website. Alternatively, call someone you trust to talk about how you feel.
Step 6. Know when to process the pain
Grief is a natural response to loss - it could be the disappearance of a family member you loved very much, the end of a relationship, a layoff, illness, or whatever. The processing of pain caused by personal loss - there is no "right" way and time frame to grieve - can take weeks or years, interspersed with many ups and downs.
- Seek support from friends and family. Sharing a loss is one of the most important factors in recovering. A support group or psychotherapist can also be a useful solution.
- Over time, the emotions associated with grief should decrease in intensity. If you don't notice any improvement, or if your symptoms seem to get worse in the long run, the pain has likely turned into major depression or a more complex form of grief. Contact a therapist to help you accept your loss.
Method 4 of 5: Helping Babies and Babies Stop Crying
Step 1. Understand why babies cry
Remember that crying is one of the few forms of communication a baby can use and is one way he signals his needs. Put yourself in their shoes and consider what might be causing them discomfort. Some common reasons babies cry are:
- Hunger. Newborns need to be fed every two to three hours throughout the day.
- Need to suck. Sucking is a natural instinct in infants, as it is the only way they have to feed.
- Loneliness. Babies need to interact with people to be healthy and happy. Their crying often depends on the desire for affection.
- Tiredness. Newborns need frequent naps and can sometimes sleep up to 16 hours a day overall.
- Unease. Think about the circumstances in which the baby bursts into tears and what he is going through to anticipate his more usual needs and desires.
- Hyper-stimulation. Too much noise, excessive movement, or exaggerated visual stimuli can overwhelm infants, leading them to cry.
- Illness. Often in newborns, the first symptom of a disease, allergy or injury is crying and a lack of reaction to attempts to calm it down.
Step 2. Ask the child a few questions
While a newborn forces you to guess what the source of the problem is, the child uses more sophisticated forms of communication, so you can ask him what's wrong. This, however, does not necessarily mean that he is able to communicate like an adult, so it is important to ask simple, undemanding questions when he seems unable to explain a problem in detail.
Step 3. Check if he's injured
Younger children may have difficulty responding when upset, so it is important for parents and caregivers to pay attention to the baby's background and physical condition when crying.
Step 4. Distract him
If he is hurt or sad, try distracting him from the pain until he calms down. Try to draw his attention to something he doesn't mind. Determine where he was hurt by asking him if he feels pain in any part of his body except where he actually hurt himself. In this way, by forcing him to focus on areas other than the painful one, you will be able to distract him.
Step 5. Reassure him
Often the child cries when he has to learn education or after a negative interaction with an adult or peer. In these cases, try to assess whether his behavior needs your intervention (for example, sharing two arguing children), making him always feel protected and loved, despite the confrontation.
Step 6. Take a break
All children misbehave every now and then. However, if your child cries, gets angry, or screams to get what they want, you need to avoid associating bad behavior with fulfilling their wishes.
- If your little one is having a tantrum, take him to a quiet room and leave him there until he stops sulking. Give him permission to return among the others when his anger has subsided.
- If a child who gets angry is old enough to walk around and understand what you are saying, invite him to go to his room, reminding him that he will be allowed to return, tell you what he wants, and explain why he is upset once he calms down. This will teach him how to effectively manage anger and disappointment, while still granting him love and respect.
Method 5 of 5: Calming an Adult in Tears
Step 1. Ask him if he needs help
Unlike the newborn and the child, the adult is able to independently assess his condition and understand if he needs help. Before you step in and try to make your contribution, always ask if you can help. If he is in pain emotionally, he may need space and time to process what he is feeling before engaging another person in an attempt to handle the situation. Sometimes, it is enough to offer to help a person cope with a discomfort.
If the situation isn't too serious and the person agrees to be distracted, make a few jokes or tell a funny anecdote. Comment on something funny or weird you read online. If it is a stranger or a distant acquaintance, try not to be too indiscreet by asking him a few questions on various topics to distract him
Step 2. Identify the cause of the pain
Is it physical or emotional pain? Have you suffered a shock or abuse? Ask, but also try to judge the situation and context to get some clues.
If the person is crying and seems injured or needs medical assistance, call 911 immediately. Stay close to them until the emergency room arrives. If it is in a dangerous spot, move it to a safer place without moving it too far, if possible
Step 3. Make physical contact in the right way
If it's a friend or loved one, a hug or holding their hand can help. An arm around the shoulders can also offer support and comfort. However, each situation is unique and requires different physical contact. If you are unsure whether the other person can feel comforted by your gestures, always ask for permission.
Step 4. Focus on the positives
Without necessarily changing the subject, find the positives of the situation that is causing emotional distress. For example, if someone has lost someone important, try to remind them of the good times they spent together and the things they loved most. If you can, recall the funniest episodes that will give her a smile or even make her laugh. Laughter can greatly reduce the urge to cry and cheer you up.
Step 5. Let her cry
Crying is a natural reaction in the face of rather intense emotional stress and, even if there are times when it is inappropriate or inappropriate, especially if there are no injured people, letting someone cry could ultimately be the most confident solution. support for those who are ill.
