People are not all the same. Each of us differs in physical appearance, behavior, attitudes, religious choices and personal values. Some can walk, see, speak and hear without problems, while others need assistance to perform these operations or perform them differently. To face the fact of being different it is necessary to be able to accept the qualities that distinguish you, establish constructive relationships and manage your diversity in a healthy way.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Accepting the Qualities that Distinguish You
Step 1. Accept that you are unique
By accepting yourself as you are, you have the opportunity to appreciate everything that makes you a particular person and learn to deal with your diversity from others. First, instead of trying to change, you need to be able to accept yourself and your current physical appearance.
- Start by defining the qualities that make you unique, such as your religious faith, your culture, your eating style (if you are vegan, for example), your medical history, your disability and your physical characteristics. List all your "differences" and accept them one by one. Review this list and try saying aloud or thinking, "I accept my religious faith. It may be different from others, but it does not negatively affect my life. I appreciate the values and ideals I believe in. They are important. and as admissible as those of other people ".
- If you find yourself expressing negative thoughts about a certain characteristic, such as, "It makes me inferior to others," think, "No, I accept it. It's not wrong. It's part of who I am."
- If you differentiate yourself from others by focusing on your diversity, you will actually be able to safeguard your self-esteem under certain circumstances. He thinks: "Yes, I'm different. Yes, I'm unique. I'm a smart and exceptional person and no one can change this situation!".
Step 2. Reconsider the characteristics that make you unique
You will probably see them as flaws, but don't be convinced because they are what makes you special. Try to think about each feature that makes you different and make sense of it.
- For example, let's say you have a physical handicap. Ask yourself how this disability has helped you grow, what have you learned and what values have you been able to acquire. Many people believe that great life lessons can be learned from difficulties, thanks to which one learns above all to value and appreciate what one has, rather than focusing on what is missing.
- Don't think you are inadequate. If you're convinced you're not good enough, handsome enough, or smart enough, rephrase these personal judgments by thinking, "By my standards, I'm capable. I don't need to be the prettiest or the smartest to be comfortable with myself. I am who I am and I love myself for it."
Step 3. Look for commonalities with others
Avoid making clear and radical distinctions between yourself and other people. This attitude risks making you feel excluded, pushed aside or rejected. Instead, analyze how you are similar to others.
- For example, we are all human and almost identical from a genetic point of view. In fact, we share 98% of our genetic makeup with chimps, so we're not that different from them either. We are living and sentient beings.
- If you feel very different from certain people, identify what points you have in common with them. For example, you may think that you belong to humankind, are interested in about the same things, or speak the same language. This way you will begin to notice how similar you are in some respects.
Step 4. Be proud of the context you come from
Diversity is not bad at all: accept the characteristics that make you a unique person, taking into account that they depend on the way you grew up, the culture in which you live and the values transmitted by your family.
- Identify the positive aspects that characterize the culture you belong to and focus on those. For example, try to reflect on your mother tongue, your religious faith, the traditions respected in your community, your way of dressing, the holidays you have taken, the values and norms that govern life in the environment in which you live., on the roles that men and women have, on social duties, on work jobs and so on.
- If you dress differently or profess a different religion than someone else, it means that you are an interesting person.
Part 2 of 3: Establishing Constructive Relationships
Step 1. Have more confidence in yourself
It is essential to build positive human relationships in order to be able to deal with one's diversity. We all need to interact with others and integrate into a group to feel good about ourselves. Generally, people are attracted to those who have a sunny disposition and are self-confident. Therefore, you have to believe in yourself to face your fears and meet new people.
- Feed a positive inner dialogue. Avoid blaming or blaming yourself. For example, you might think, "What a loser! I can't do any good!".
- Cultivate a fuller presence to the experience of the moment. In this way, you will avoid judging yourself and will come to accept yourself. Just notice everything around you. What colors or objects do you see? What's your mood? What noises do you hear? Try to become aware of what you think, feel and are around you.
- Each of us has our means to be comfortable with ourselves. Don't hesitate to use yours. Buy a nice dress, sing, dance, do theater or anything else that gives you a sense of well-being.
Step 2. Find people closest to your reality
If you feel different and even a little rejected, consider finding a group of people similar to you (culturally, ethnically, religiously or with whom you can share interests, who suffer from the same disability as you, who they also resemble you in appearance, which have in common your same values and so on). We all need to feel part of a community to be happy and feel good.
- Join an association or take a class where people share the same passion. Here are some examples: a course in science, mathematics, theater, dance, singing or a student association.
- Try playing a sport at school or in your free time, such as: basketball, volleyball, soccer, athletics, cross-country running, water polo, tennis, dance.
- Check out the Meetup site to find a group that fits your interests: hiking, painting, video games, rock climbing and more. Make sure it does not present any danger and, if you are a minor, let your parents or guardians know about it.
Step 3. Be yourself
Sincerity is important in making friends with others. Nobody wants to interact or hang out with people who wear a mask. Therefore, try to be yourself. Don't change your personality (by talking or acting a certain way) to try to integrate into a group.
- Scream when you want (but don't get in trouble), run everywhere, invent crazy songs. Do whatever you like! Don't change for anyone, but only for yourself.
- If you are the silent type, don't force yourself to behave differently. If you are a hippie at heart, continue to be one.
- Create your style. For example, if you love a clothing brand, follow its fashion, but don't wear the clothes it makes because everyone does. If you like jeans and long dresses, don't hesitate to wear them.
Part 3 of 3: Managing Your Diversity
Step 1. Help others understand you better
By making your culture, values and personal characteristics known, you will be able to dismantle the prejudices and negative stereotypes associated with what makes you unique and special. When people are informed, they are willing to open up and learn to accept the diversity and differences between people.
- Start talking about yourself with people you trust and think you can trust.
- The more you become familiar with talking about yourself, your past and your culture, the easier it will be.
Step 2. Be assertive with bullies
Unfortunately, sometimes people's rejection and aggression are accentuated in the face of a diversity - such as a disability or obesity. If someone demoralizes or insults you, you can handle this by acting assertively. Assertiveness means openly communicating everything you think and feel, having respect for your interlocutor.
- For example, if I assert you if you put it this way: "I get nervous when you tell me I'm weird." By doing so, you focus attention on what you are feeling rather than the other person's behavior, which becomes secondary to your mood. He continues to talk giving further explanations: "I'm different, but we all are. I would be grateful if you didn't call me strange. I respect you and expect the same treatment from you."
- Another way to show that you are an assertive person is to set boundaries. For example, you might say, "I'd like you to stop calling me weird. If you continue, I'll be forced to distance myself from you. I don't tolerate insults."
- If you are verbally or physically harassed, ask a teacher, your therapist, or the director of your school for help.
Step 3. Do some research on "different" people
Learn about Led Zeppelin, Harriet Tubman, Martin Luther King and the hippie movement - there's a lot to learn from them. According to some, they embody the true meaning of the words "unique" and "smart". They differed from the crowd, they had the courage to be different and some of them even risked their lives to defend what they believed.
