Acting happily can be a temporary measure to be taken for some time. However, by acting with joy, you can start to actually feel happier, to the point where you hardly have to pretend anymore. If pretending to be cheerful becomes a daily necessity, it will be best to consider talking to your doctor because you may be suffering from depression.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Looking Happy
Step 1. Smile to make others happy
When you smile, you automatically appear more joyful in other people's eyes. It also makes you look more attractive and relaxed, which helps make you look even happier and more sunny.
- In fact, the brain perceives someone else's smile as a reward. For this reason, when you smile at a person, you help them think happier thoughts.
- Laughing at other people's jokes is certainly helpful too, but be careful to smile only when it seems appropriate. For example, if someone makes a serious statement, this is not the time to be smiling.
- Also, don't smile for too long. Otherwise, people will start to doubt that you are faking it.
- Try to smile sincerely. When the mood isn't right, it's not easy to smile genuinely, but try to make an effort and smile openly as a half smile may not be enough to convince others that you are happy. A good way to get a sincere smile is to think of something that fills your heart with joy, like your kids or pet.
Step 2. Smile to feel happier yourself
Scientists have confirmed that smiling has the power to instantly make us happier. When you smile, you send a signal to your body that you are joyful and at that point your brain releases chemicals that help make you feel happier.
- To begin with, neuropeptides are released - molecules that help counteract stress.
- Following this, other neurotransmitters, endorphins, dopamine and serotonin are released, which help make you feel calmer and happier.
Step 3. Respond with conviction to questions related to your state of well-being
When someone asks you how you are, you can't let them know how you really feel if you're down in the dumps, but you want to look happy. You have to rethink the answer and say something credible.
- One technique to be able to respond with conviction is to imagine that you are an actor or an actress. Play a joyful character and think about how he would respond if someone asked him "How are you?" or "How do you feel?". He would definitely use a cheery tone while sporting a smile!
- Avoid dwelling on it. In most cases, people aren't really interested in your well-being. Especially in formal situations, a short answer, like "I'm great!", Is all they hope to hear.
Step 4. Look confident
Acting like a self-confident person can help you convey a sense of happiness, even when you're actually feeling down. When you act with conviction, others perceive you as a confident person, so you don't need to feel really confident to convince them that this is the case. However, just like when you pretend to be happy, pretending to be confident can also help you really build your confidence.
- A very simple way to look and feel more confident is to keep your back straight. Leaning forward does not convey confidence.
- It is also important to look people in the eye. Constantly looking down or elsewhere is a sign of insecurity.
- When you speak, use a high enough tone of voice to be heard. Say the words clearly and distinctly.
- Don't be afraid to make a joke. Confident people often use humor to spread their good mood.
Step 5. Don't shy away from commitments
Often, when you are sad, you feel the need to slow down the pace of the daily routine. You may want to stay indoors and feel sorry for yourself, but if you're trying to look happy, you need to at least deal with the commitments of your normal routine, such as going to work, meeting friends, and being with your family.
Step 6. Be enthusiastic
Enthusiasm is not synonymous with happiness, but it can follow in its footsteps in case of need. If you dedicate yourself fully to your life, welcoming it with enthusiasm, you will seem happier and, in fact, in the future you will become.
- Use your own words. One way to show enthusiasm is to simply express how excited you are about something. For example, suppose your boss is looking for a volunteer to complete a new project, you might say "I would be happy to be able to work on this project, it looks really interesting." It might seem superfluous to say, but try not to outright criticize what you are trying to be enthusiastic about. Saying "It's a trivial thing" doesn't convey enthusiasm.
- The tone of voice also matters. Don't talk too exuberantly to avoid the risk of sounding sarcastic, but still try to convey liveliness with your voice to show your enthusiasm.
- Enthusiasm is a type of vulnerability. Holding back or pretending that something you don't like can be a way to protect yourself. When you express your appreciation of something, you express an opinion that other people might judge negatively.
- Remember that praise also helps make others happier, so try to be generous with compliments to make people feel good in your presence. Part of their happiness will naturally project onto you as well.
Part 2 of 3: Being Happier
Step 1. Exercise
Everyone knows that exercise is good for the overall health of the body, but it is often forgotten that it also improves mood. The brain thinks exercise is stressful, so it releases a protein that promotes relaxation. Furthermore, exercise causes the release of endorphins, whose function is to counteract the pain caused by exertion and produce happy emotions.
- Exercising also helps you sleep better, and sleep could be a problem when you're not happy. It also improves self-esteem, so it helps make you feel even better.
- Try different disciplines to find the one you like best. If you don't like playing soccer, try dancing. If tennis isn't your thing, experiment with swimming.
- You should get at least 150 minutes of exercise per week. Some experts recommend starting the day with 20 minutes of physical activity because it improves your mood and gives you the energy to go until the evening.
Step 2. Practice gratitude
People who feel grateful and find ways to express it are generally happier. Gratitude is the active practice of feeling grateful for the things and people we can rely on in our lives.
- Try to openly thank the people who love you for what they do and who they are. Don't just think it in your mind, let them know.
- Another way to practice gratitude is to keep a journal in which to write down a short list of things you feel grateful for each night.
Step 3. Be curious
Happy people often go in search of new adventures; they want to try different things, explore other cultures and see new places. They keep a sense of awe about the world alive and find ways to turn every day into a beautiful experience.
- Don't think that you need to have a lot of money to keep curiosity alive. You can do it even without leaving the place where you live. For example, taste a cuisine that you do not yet know or take a course in a subject that has always fascinated you.
- Explore areas of your city that you've never been to before or take part in a cultural event. You are constantly looking for something new that piques your interest.
Step 4. Learn to love yourself
Happier people have good self-esteem and that means they like themselves the way they are. If you're in the habit of continually denigrating yourself, changing your attitude can help make you generally feel happier.
- One way to start appreciating your qualities is to make a list of your strengths and characteristics that you admire. Think about the compliments you've received or ask a friend to help you if you struggle to recognize your positives on your own.
- Don't feed the negativity. When a negative thought about yourself comes to mind, try to turn it into something positive or at least realistic. For example, if you thought "I hate my body", turn it into "I don't always like how my body looks, but I appreciate all the things it does for me, like letting me hug my children, cook good dishes and observe the sunset".
Step 5. Take care of yourself
Providing for your needs can help you feel happier, as when the body is not healthy, the mind is affected as well. If you don't feel physically well, it's hard to be happy or have self-esteem.
- First, make sure you get enough sleep every night. To ensure you get the eight hours of sleep you need, get to bed early and allow yourself an hour of relaxation before falling asleep.
- Don't overlook the importance of eating healthily. Go for lean sources of protein, such as fish and poultry, whole grains, fruits, vegetables and low-fat dairy products, while also paying attention to quantities.
Step 6. Find hobbies you enjoy
Doing the things you love can definitely make you happier, especially if you take the time to do it regularly. Any activity you enjoy can be considered a hobby, even going to the movies. However, if possible, try to find a passion that allows you to enter a "flow" of creativity, to temporarily detach yourself from the rest of the world.
- If you still don't know which hobby you might like, try different ones. To choose them, take a look at the books on the subject available in the library.
- When you have chosen a hobby you want to try your hand at, find out if there are any courses organized by the municipality. You can also ask at local schools or organizations.
Part 3 of 3: Treating Depression
Step 1. Detect the symptoms of the disease
Depression is a widespread mood affecting disorder. A common symptom is feeling sad or anxious for long periods or hopeless. If you feel the need to pretend to be happy, you may be experiencing symptoms of the disease.
- Frequent feelings of guilt or worthlessness or not feeling pleasure or interest in pursuing your hobbies or activities you normally enjoy are other possible symptoms of the disease.
- You may also feel more tired or have a hard time staying focused. Your memory may also suffer, and you may have difficulty making decisions.
- You may find it difficult to sleep or experience weight changes.
- Having suicidal thoughts or harming yourself are additional symptoms.
- Depression can strike at certain times in life, for example after pregnancy. Some people only experience it during the winter, when the light is poor; in this case we speak of seasonal affective disorder.
Step 2. Go to a therapist for help
It will give you tips on how to deal with the problems that are contributing to the disease. Popular therapies to treat depression include: problem solving therapy, interpersonal therapy, and cognitive behavioral therapy.
- If you know someone who has already been in therapy, consider getting a suggestion for the name of a valid therapist. It might help you refine your search.
- If the idea of having to pay for a psychotherapist scares you, ask your doctor if there is the possibility of getting free or semi-free help.
Step 3. Try treating yourself with antidepressants
If you feel like you have to pretend you're happy all the time, maybe your body needs some help from chemistry to feel better. Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, and antidepressant medications can intervene to correct it. There are many categories of antidepressants and each acts differently, so it is imperative that you consult your doctor to find the right one for you.
- A common type of antidepressant is that of serotonin reuptake inhibitors (or SSRIs). This category of drugs includes for example those based on sertraline (such as Zoloft), fluoxetine (such as Prozac) and paroxetine (such as Paxil). The advantage of these antidepressants is that they generally have fewer side effects than the others.
- Another category is that of serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (or SNRIs). This class of drugs includes, among others, those based on venlafaxine (such as Efexor) and duloxetine (Cymbalta).
- Bupropion (active ingredient for example of Wellbutrin) belongs to the class of norepinephrine and dopamine reuptake inhibitors. The advantage of these drugs is that they are less likely to impair sexual function.
