What's your addiction? Whether it's alcoholism, smoking, sex, drugs, lies, or gambling, admitting you have a problem is the first step to addressing it, even if it's not easy. The time has come to make a plan to quit, seek help, and prepare yourself for the obstacles you will encounter. If you want to learn how to lose a bad habit and start living again, keep reading the article.
If you need advice on overcoming an addiction, see the Additional Resources section at the end of the article to learn about the facilities that can help you.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Deciding to Quit
Step 1. List the harmful effects of your addiction
It is not pleasant to know all the damage caused by an addiction, but seeing them in black and white, you can decide to quit more quickly. Take a pen and paper, concentrate and write down all the negative effects that you have experienced from the beginning.
- Indicate why you developed this addiction. Ask yourself what prevents you from doing or what makes it easier for you.
- Think about the consequences on your physical health. Did it put you at a higher risk for cancer, heart disease, or other medical conditions? Maybe it has already put a strain on your health.
- Write down to what extent the idea of having developed an addiction distresses you. Do you feel embarrassed? In many cases, addictions lead to shame and embarrassment, but also to depression, anxiety and other mood disorders.
- To what extent has it affected your interpersonal relationships? Did it stop you from being with the people you love? Did it take your time away from building new relationships?
- Some addictions destroy people financially. Quantify the money spent every day, every week, and every month to fuel this behavior. Consider whether it affected your work.
- How many hassles does it cause you every day? For example, if you smoke, you may be tired of having to leave the office every time you want to light a cigarette.
Step 2. Make a list of the positive changes you want in life
Once you have indicated all the negative effects, think about how much your life would improve if you got rid of this problem. Imagine your life after this decision. How would you like it?
- You may enjoy a feeling of freedom that you haven't felt in years;
- You would have more time to devote to people, hobbies, and other pleasures;
- You may be able to put money aside again;
- You would be sure to do everything possible to keep yourself healthy. You would immediately feel better physically.
- You would be proud of yourself again and full of confidence.
Step 3. Write down your promise
Having a list of good reasons to quit will help you stick to your plan over the long term. Your reasons for quitting must be more important to you than continuing with your addiction. It is a very difficult mental obstacle, but it is the first step to quitting. Nobody can get you to do this but yourself. Then, write down the concrete reasons why you want to defeat your addiction. Only you know them. Here are some examples:
- You still want to have the energy to live your life fully;
- You spend too much to support your addiction;
- You want to be a better companion for those around you;
- You want to get to know your grandchildren someday.
Part 2 of 3: Creating a Plan
Step 1. Set a date to quit
Don't fix it for tomorrow unless you're sure a sudden change is the best decision. Don't stare at it more than a month later as you may lose motivation in the long run. Make it happen within a couple of weeks so that you have enough time to prepare mentally and physically.
- Consider an important date to keep you motivated: your birthday, your dad's birthday, your daughter's graduation day, and so on.
- Mark the date on your calendar and announce your decision to those around you. Don't back down when the time comes. Make a firm commitment to yourself about quitting on the appointed day.
- If you need medical assistance, don't hesitate to get it. Some addictions can trigger dangerous reactions if they are not stopped properly.
Step 2. Seek personal and professional support
You may think you don't need it, but it's definitely best to get support in the fight against addiction. Since many people are fighting the same battle as you, there are structures that can provide you with support, keep you motivated, offer you advice, and encourage you not to throw in the towel if you take a misstep.
- Look for online and in-person support groups at dedicated centers designed to help those with a certain addiction problem. Many are free.
- Make an appointment with a therapist who specializes in addiction recovery. Find a specialist who can make you feel comfortable and rely on his advice in the following months. The most used and effective techniques in the treatment of addictions are cognitive-behavioral therapy, behavioral therapy, motivational interview, Gestalt therapy and the so-called "Life Skills Training" (a program to prevent the use and abuse of substances). A therapeutic path offers you privacy and a treatment based on your needs and goals.
- Seek support from friends and people who love you. Let them know how important their help is. If you are addicted to a substance, ask them not to use it in your presence.
Step 3. Identify the triggers
We all have something that triggers automatic behaviors. For example, if you have problems with alcohol, you may have a hard time going to a restaurant without feeling the urge to drink. If gambling is the problem, you may feel the need to stop when you walk past the casino on the way home to work. By recognizing the factors that trigger your addiction, you will be able to control yourself when it comes time to quit.
- Stress is often a factor that triggers various types of addictions.
- Some situations, such as parties or other social settings, can foster behaviors that prevent you from quitting.
- Even some people can be a trigger in this regard.
Step 4. Begin to gradually abandon the behaviors that fuel your addiction
Instead of cutting it off abruptly, start slowly and gradually. For many people it is the easiest way. A great approach is to moderate the frequency by progressively decreasing until the day you have decided to stop permanently.
Step 5. Prepare the environment
Eliminate all objects that remind you of your addiction from your home, car and workplace. Remove anything that accompanies and promotes harmful conduct.
- Consider replacing everything you throw away with items that have a positive and comforting effect. Fill the refrigerator with healthy food. Get some good books or DVDs (make sure it doesn't have any content that triggers your cravings). At home, use candles or other aesthetically pleasing furnishings.
- You could paint your room, fix the furniture, or buy some new pillows. Transforming the space you live in will give you the idea of a new beginning.
Part 3 of 3: Quitting and Managing Withdrawal
Step 1. Give up your addiction as you planned
When the big day comes, keep your promise and stop. The first few days will be difficult. Keep busy and maintain a positive attitude. You are on the right path to detox.
Step 2. Fill up your time
If you need distractions, try working out, pursuing a new hobby, cooking, or hanging out with friends. Become part of an association, sports team or other group that allows you to make new friends and start a new chapter in your life, not governed by deleterious behavior. When positive, social interactions can stimulate the production of neurotransmitters that promote the feeling of happiness and satisfaction without the need for psychoactive substances.
Physical activity promotes the production of endorphins as well as addictive substances, which is why you may have heard the expression "runner high". However, sport allows you to improve your health and lessen the effects of withdrawal by offering you something that makes you feel good
Step 3. Stay away from triggers
Avoid people, places and objects that make you resume old habits. You have to rebuild your whole daily life until you are able to manage yourself.
Step 4. Don't give in to rationalizing thoughts (which tend to justify certain behaviors)
The physical and mental pain of abstinence is no joke and you will probably start to think that your addiction wasn't that bad after all. Don't listen to any voice that prompts you to start over. Don't give up when crises get tough. In the end, you will be rewarded for every sacrifice.
- The most frequent rationalized thoughts are: "we live in a free country" or "sooner or later we must die of something". Do not resign yourself to this defeatist attitude.
- Review the list of reasons you decided to quit to remind yourself why you are following a path of quitting. Think about why quitting is more important than continuing.
- Attend a support group and consult with your therapist whenever you suspect that you are falling back into the addiction trap.
Step 5. Don't let a relapse be the end of it all
Anyone can take missteps. This does not mean that you have to give up and resume the old behaviors as if the recovery had totally failed. If you made a mistake, work out why and determine what changes to make if it happens again. Get back on track and roll up your sleeves.
- Relapses serve to build experiences, so you shouldn't look at them as a failure. It takes time to acquire new habits. Follow your care instead of giving up.
- Don't let shame and guilt take over if you have a relapse. You are working hard and all you can do is continue on your way.
Step 6. Celebrate your victories
Encourage yourself when you reach a goal that you set for yourself, even if it is marginal. Overcoming an addiction is hard work and deserves a reward.
Additional Resources
| Structure | Telephone number |
|---|---|
| Alcoholics Anonymous Italy | 800 411406 |
| Green phone against gambling | 800 558822 |
| Green phone against smoking | 800 554088 |
| Green Phone Drugs | 800 1860707 |
| Anti-Doping Green Phone | 800 896970 |
Advice
- Keep your mind busy with constructive thoughts.
- Plan all your days.
- Meditation can be very helpful.
- Follow the suggestions given to you. They vary according to the therapeutic path, but generally the psychotherapist expects the patient to practice at home. The Twelve Steps program is also about following a group and applying a set of principles.
- Stay away from anything that reminds you of your addiction and think about the consequences rather than the pleasure it gave you. Otherwise, only the enjoyment that accompanied it will come to mind.
- Focus on the important things. Don't always think about your addiction. Go out with friends, pursue a hobby, do something to distract yourself.
- Don't stop fighting. It will be a tough fight, but after many sacrifices you will feel like a completely new person.
- Remember that what you are doing is not just about you, it is about other people as well.
- When you're tempted, try your hand at the things you're good at. For example, if you are a smoker but you like to play the guitar, strum it when you want to smoke.
- Even if it's hard, try to forgive yourself when you make a mistake. Even those who have never had addiction problems know that it is not easy. This is why many people struggle, but it is also why many others try to offer their help.
Warnings
- Recognize the signs that indicate you are entering treacherous territory. Avoid times of day when you feel more likely to give in. You have to be strong especially during times when desire takes over.
- Be careful when you start to recover. Often those with addiction problems ruin everything when the situation begins to improve. Be persistent.
