Many are fighting against eating disorders. Do not be one of them, but learn to feel better about yourself. In this regard, this article can be a valuable help.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: For Everyone
Step 1. Learn about the various types of eating disorders
This article describes the three main disorders: anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge eating disorder. Eating disorders are divided into two DSM-IV categories (psychiatric classification), one of which includes anorexia nervosa and the other bulimia nervosa, although the two often overlap. It is important to be aware that there are other types of eating disorders as well, so if you have a difficult or unhappy relationship with food, talking to a doctor or psychotherapist can help you pinpoint the problem.
- Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder characterized by refusal of food and excessive weight loss. The desire to lose weight becomes an all-consuming obsession for anorexic people, who share three main characteristics: inability or refusal to have a healthy body weight, fear of gaining weight and distorted body image.
- People with bulimia nervosa have a recurring obsession with overeating and therefore use various methods to free themselves, such as vomiting or abuse of laxatives to avoid weight gain caused by binge eating.
- Binge eating disorder occurs when a person eats impulsively and uncontrollably. Unlike bulimia, people with bulimia do not shed the food they eat, although they may occasionally go on a diet due to guilt, self-hatred or shame.
Step 2. Learn about the factors that cause or contribute to the onset of eating disorders
There are several possible causes related to eating disorders which can include neurobiological and hereditary factors, low self-esteem, high anxiety, a desire for perfection, a constant need to please people, physical or sexual abuse, family conflict, or an inability to express one's emotions.
Step 3. Consider making a donation to organizations committed to helping people with eating disorders
There are many organizations that work to improve knowledge of eating disorders and to help those who suffer from them. If you know someone or are taking care of someone with eating disorders, making a donation can help fight this problem, improve the services offered and spread information.
Method 2 of 4: For People with an Eating Disorder
Step 1. Pay attention to the warning signs
You need to be honest with yourself when you spot the warning signs. It is a dangerous condition and the mind keeps you from considering the risks by deluding itself, hiding and deceiving. After a while, these loopholes turn into bad habits that you won't even notice anymore. Some of the warning signs to watch out for are:
- Underweight (less than 85% of weight for your age and height).
- Obsession with diets that manifests itself in speeches and in the intention to find a way to eat less.
- Terror of being or becoming "fat"; inflexibility on one's own weight and physical shape.
- Being prone to wearing baggy or loose clothing to try to hide sudden or dramatic weight loss.
- Finding excuses for not being present at meals or finding a way to eat very little, hide food, or throw it away later.
- Poor health status. You suffer from bruises easily, you have no energy, the skin is pale and yellowish, the hair is dull and dry, you feel dizzy, you feel cold much more than others (poor circulation), the eyes are dry, the tongue is swollen, the gums bleed, suffer from water retention and, if you are a woman, have missed three or more menstrual cycles. For bulimia, additional signs could be scars or calluses on the back of the hand caused by using the fingers to induce vomiting, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, joint swelling, etc.
- If someone tells you that you are underweight, you do not believe them, even claiming the opposite. You can't take any suggestions that you have lost excess weight seriously.
- You avoid relating and dating people.
- You undergo a grueling and hard workout that could be called overexertion.
Step 2. Talk to a therapist who specializes in treating eating disorders
A trained professional can help you analyze thoughts and feelings that force you to have an extremely restrictive diet or recurring binges. If you're too ashamed to talk to someone about it, take it easy because an eating disorder psychotherapist won't make you feel embarrassed. He is a specialist who has dedicated his professional life to helping others overcome eating disorders, knows what you are going through, understands the underlying causes and, therefore, can assist you on this path. Expect to:
- Be listened to with respect.
- Get the chance to tell your story and ask for targeted help.
- Free yourself of any pressure exerted on you by family and friends. The therapist can act as a buffer and counselor for them too or, at the very least, teach you strategies to adapt to stressful situations during the healing process and to overcome conflicts within the family.
- Be treated like a smart person and be reassured that you'll be fine again.
Step 3. Determine your reasons for not eating well
It can be useful in the therapeutic path to do a little introspection, in order to analyze the reason why you feel obliged to continue losing weight, despising your body. You may find that the eating disorder has turned into a dangerous way of dealing with something else that harms you, such as a family conflict, lack of affection, or low self-esteem.
- Are you happy with your appearance? If not, why don't you appreciate yourself?
- Do you make constant comparisons with others? The media, and the distorted images they spread, are the biggest culprits in these cases, but friends, successful people, and people you have a certain admiration for can also be a source of confrontation.
- Do you overeat or only choose junk food when you are most emotional? If so, this attitude may have morphed into a habit that has taken over on a subconscious level, taking the place of more appropriate behaviors, including ignoring negative self-talk or learning to praise oneself for things done right.
- Do you think having a leaner body allows you to improve in sports? While some sports, such as swimming, encourage a leaner body (as far as women are concerned), keep in mind that many other factors come into play in determining success in any sport. In no physical activity it is worth sacrificing one's health.
Step 4. Keep a food diary
The food diary serves two purposes. The first, of a more practical and scientific nature, is to establish eating habits and allow you (and your therapist, if you allow them to read it) to understand what types of food you eat, when and how. The second, more personal, is to write down your thoughts, feelings and emotions associated with the eating habits you have developed. In essence, it is a space to write about your fears (in order to face them) and your dreams (so that you can start planning goals and pursuing them). Here is a list of things to include and deepen in the food diary.
- Ask yourself what is troubling you right now. Do you always compare yourself with magazine models? Are you under stress (from school, university or work, family problems, peer pressure)?
- Write down the eating habits you have developed and how you feel about them.
- Write down how you feel when you struggle to control your eating habits.
- If you manipulate people to deceive them and hide your behaviors, how do you feel? Address this topic in your food diary.
- Write down the things you have accomplished in your life. You will be able to realize everything you have accomplished. You will feel better about yourself when you see that many good things have been accomplished up to that point.
Step 5. Seek support from a trusted friend, parent, family member, or someone else you care about
Talk to him about what you are going through. He will obviously care about you and try to help you overcome your eating disorder, even if it's just about being around you.
Learn to express your feelings aloud without being ashamed of what you feel. One of the key factors behind many ailments is the reluctance or inability to stand up for oneself, to fully express one's feelings and preferences. Once it becomes a habit, self-affirmation is lost, making us feel less worthy and unable to get out of conflict and unhappiness, so the eating disorder becomes a kind of crutch that "orders" to do certain things (even if in a rather distorted and harmful way). Being assertive is not about being arrogant or self-centered, but it is about letting others know what you are worth and that you deserve consideration and appreciation
Step 6. Find other ways to cope with your emotions
Let off steam in a positive way so you can relax and unwind after a stressful day. Allow yourself these moments of pause, where you can focus only on yourself. For example, listen to some music, go for a walk, watch the sunset or update your journal. The possibilities are endless. Find something that you enjoy and that relaxes you so that you can deal with the most adverse and stressful emotions.
Choose something that you have wanted to do for a long time, for which you have never found the time or the opportunity. Take a class to learn something you'd always like to try, start a blog or website, learn to play a musical instrument, take a vacation, or read a book or series of operas
Step 7. Calm down when you lose control
Call someone, touch things near you, such as a desk, kitchen counter, a soft toy, a wall, or hug someone who makes you feel safe.
- Learn techniques for reducing stress. Meditation is an excellent choice, but you can also try a hot bath, massage, and various relaxation techniques.
- Don't neglect sleep quality and establish a healthy sleep routine. The rest given by sleep can restore both your perspectives and your energies. If you're not getting enough sleep due to stress and worry, consider ways to improve your sleep habits.
Step 8. Be as kind to yourself as you are to others
Look at the people you consider beautiful despite all their quirks and extravagances and appreciate yourself equally. Observe your inner beauty, instead of focusing on flaws. Stop being so hard on your appearance, because every physical conformation is a miracle, an instant of life that fits into the continuum of time. You deserve to be happy right now.
Step 9. Put the scale away
Nobody should weigh themselves every day, whether they have an eating disorder or not. If you did, you would give too much importance to the constant fluctuations of the weight, ending up obsessing with the numbers instead of focusing on the big picture. Gradually reduce the number of times you weigh yourself until you use the scale once a week.
Let your clothes give you an index of your fitness rather than the balance. Choose those clothes that do not deviate from your target weight and use them as a parameter for looking good and a healthy weight
Step 10. Take small steps and see every small, healthy change as a major advance in the healing process
Increase your food portions little by little, train less frequently, and so on. Quitting suddenly is not only more difficult emotionally, but it can upset the body and cause other health problems. Again, it is best to proceed under the supervision of a professional, perhaps an eating disorder specialist.
Method 3 of 4: For Friend Who Suffers from Eating Disorders
Step 1. Pay attention to the warning signs described above
If you notice these signs in your friend, don't hesitate to intervene. When they become evident, his condition is very serious, so the sooner you can help him fight the eating disorder, the better.
- Learn about the eating disorder from trusted sources.
- Be prepared to do everything possible for the person suffering from the eating disorder to undergo appropriate occupational therapy as soon as possible. Also be ready to support treatment and support this person on their long journey if necessary.
Step 2. Talk privately with your friend about what they are going through and what you have noticed
Be kind and above all don't judge. Explain that you are worried about him and that you would like to help him in any way you can. Ask him for some suggestions so you can assist him.
Try to be a source of tranquility for him. Avoid overdoing it, upsetting or reproaching it
Step 3. Stand beside him
Listen to his problems, without judging, and let him express his emotions without making him think that his problems do not interest you. This task requires the ability to listen, reformulate and synthesize what you feel, so that you are certain that you have been heard and understood. Support him, but don't try to take control of the situation.
- Read the How to Listen article for more tips on how to actively listen to him.
- Be loving, attentive, and helpful. Show that you love him for who he is.
Step 4. Don't talk about food or weight in a negative way
If you go out for lunch together, avoid saying things like "I have a craving for ice cream, even though I shouldn't." Also, don't ask him what he ate, how much weight he lost or gained, and so on, but most importantly, don't show yourself never disappointed when he loses weight.
- Don't expect them to gain weight. It's like putting a red cloth in front of a bull!
- Don't humiliate him or blame him for his eating disorder. It goes far beyond his willpower.
- Avoid making jokes about body weight or other things that your friend might misinterpret.
Step 5. Be positive
Compliment him and help him work on his overall self-esteem, not just his image. Express your happiness whenever it is with you!
Step 6. Get help from your friend
Talk to a counselor, therapist, partner, or parents about the best ways to help him. As mentioned earlier, this is the most important part of getting it right, so do what you can to facilitate it.
Method 4 of 4: For Parents, Other Health Care Professionals and Family Members
Step 1. Read the tips described in the section for friends
Many of those approaches are equally applicable in situations where one lives with or cares for someone with an eating disorder. Above all, make sure that the sufferer is under medical supervision and treatment; if you have legal responsibility for this person, make sure they get professional help immediately.
This article is based on the assumption that an eating disorder sufferer is a child or teenager, but most of these steps are fine for adult family members as well
Step 2. Be calm and supportive
As a family member, you will be in constant contact with the child or adolescent, so they need to know that you are not angry with them or that you will not be inundated with requests every time you see them. It may seem very binding, but it's time for both of you to learn, so you'll need to have patience, courage, and calmness to support it in a positive and effective way.
- Show affection and kindness. Eating disorder sufferers need to know they are loved.
- Support therapy, but don't try to meddle and take control. Do not ask intrusive questions, do not address the issue of weight directly and, if you have special doubts, talk to your therapist or doctor.
Step 3. Show love and attention to all family members
Don't neglect others to support those with eating disorders. If all the worry and attention is turned exclusively to him, others will feel neglected, while the recipient will feel that they are being unduly cared for. More than anything else (while waiting for everyone else to do the same), focus on creating a family balance that enriches and supports everyone.
Step 4. Be emotionally available
You will likely be tempted to ignore, push away, or abandon the sufferer if you feel helpless or angry about the situation. However, by not offering emotional support, you will harm him. It is possible to give him all your love and, at the same time, effectively manage his manipulative methods, but if you find this too difficult a task, talk to your therapist for suggestions.
Step 5. See food as life support, a healthy and fulfilling part of family life
If someone in the house is obsessed with talking about food or weight, they need to calm down. Avoid obsessive talk about weight or diets. Have a chat with any family member who keeps raising these kinds of topics without thinking about it. Also, do not use food as a punishment or reward in raising children. Food must be valued, not rationed or used as a reward, and if this means that the whole family has to change their view of food, then a turning point will have to happen for everyone.
- Encourage those with eating disorders to take care of themselves rather than others. Don't let him cook for the family or go grocery shopping alone, or you will encourage him to deny himself things and give them to others, continuing a harmful thinking pattern.
- Do not try to limit your food intake unless specifically advised by your doctor.
Step 6. Be critical of media messages
Teach the child or adolescent not to accept media messages. Show him how to think critically and encourage him to question messages from the media, as well as those of his peers and people who influence him.
Promote open communication from a young age. Teach the child or adolescent to communicate with you in an open and sincere way, and talk to him in the same way. If he feels he has nothing to hide, he is already missing a key element on which eating disorders are based
Step 7. Build self-esteem in the child or adolescent
Show him that you love him no matter what, and praise him frequently for things done right. If he fails at something, help him accept the situation. In fact, one of the best lessons a parent can teach is to learn from failure and nurture the ability to bounce back from difficult situations.
Help your child accept and appreciate their body. He encourages physical activity and self-confidence in relation to his body from a very young age. Explain to him the importance of flexibility and strength favored by sport, make him appreciate being outdoors and in nature by frequent walks, bike rides, hikes and running together. If you can, participate in cycling, running, etc. events together. so that he grows up considering physical activity as a healthy habit that gives the opportunity for bonding
Advice
- Models and actors in real life are not as perfect as they appear on magazine covers. They are made up and dressed like professionals that make them look more beautiful than they really are. Furthermore, the images are often modified with programs such as photoshop to eliminate imperfections and make their bodies look perfect, so it is unfair to confront the unreal models proposed by the magazines.
- Eat only when you are hungry. Sometimes we are tempted to eat something sweet when we are sad, bored or frustrated, but this has negative side effects on health and appearance. The reason why you feel the need to eat sweet things, when you have a certain mood, is that sugar-based foods promote the production of endorphins (a substance that induces a state of happiness and well-being), therefore when the level of endorphins falls in the body, you feel the need to eat something sweet. Try to achieve the same level of happiness by playing a sport, so as not to suffer negative side effects on your weight. If you crave sweets and snacks whenever you feel down, you risk eating to compensate (this is also an eating disorder).
- Find a healthier beauty ideal than the one proposed by magazines that points to extreme thinness. Don't aim to look like the emaciated models on the catwalk. Focus more on what you find beautiful about ordinary people.
Warnings
- Fasting for several days or throwing up after eating can slow down metabolism. This means that if one day you want to eat and not throw up, your body won't be able to burn the calories you eat, but it will store what you ate and turn it into fat.
- If you are tempted to fast for several days in a row or throw up after just eating, stop. This is how an eating disorder begins. If you don't start developing bad eating habits, you won't suffer from eating disorders, right?
- If the problem becomes serious, ask for help. You can lose weight and stay healthy in shape without suffering from eating disorders.
