What do all popular people have in common? Do they all wear the same clothes? Do they wear the same haircut? Do they say the same things? Certainly not! There are popular people all over the world who enjoy their social status at school, at work or wherever they go. There is no magical quality that can make you popular, but if you can get noticed, be sociable and get involved in events, you will improve your ability to attract looks and smiles wherever you go. If you want to learn how to be popular, all you have to do is follow the advice in this article.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Get Noticed
Step 1. Believe in yourself
Nobody is perfect, therefore perfection is not required to be popular. Even if you feel distant from being an ideal person, the first step to gain confidence is to believe in yourself.
- Don't hide - if the time is right, get up and enjoy the spotlight. By spending most of your time worrying about your appearance or the judgment of others, you won't get very far. Instead, learn to love who you are and what you do. By loving yourself you will also become attractive in the eyes of others.
- Get noticed even during the lessons; raise your hand and complete your homework on time. People will learn about who you are. Never be afraid to speak out!
- Pretend until it becomes real! Even if you don't feel really confident, move with equal confidence; is the first step to be able to feel really good.
- Showing confidence is closely related to body language. Walk with your head held high and keep your arms on your hips instead of crossing them across your chest. Don't keep your back or shoulders hunched.
- Develop your confidence by excelling at activities you enjoy or pursuing new interests. By identifying something that you are really passionate about, it will make you feel more proud of yourself.
Step 2. Get into the fray
Try to get out of that area where you feel comfortable. If you are not popular it is because you are not comfortable doing the things that popular people do naturally, such as:
- Starting a conversation with someone on the train, on the bus; tell a joke; making advances to someone and, in general, entertaining others. Remember that being popular simply means being known by others, and attracting their attention.
- Don't wait for others to speak to you first, start talking to people you've never spoken to before.
- You may be a little introverted; accept being shy or too shy, but to get what you want you have to change the way you interact with people.
- You may feel superficial at first, but remember that being yourself is all about knowing what you really want from life.
Step 3. Find your style
You don't need to dye your hair pink or tattoo your face to get noticed. However, you should find your own personal look and style, and let others notice that you are comfortable with yourself.
- Hidden behind a pair of gray sweatpants you will not be able to be noticed, or at least not as you wish! Find a look that makes you feel comfortable, whatever it is, and make it yours.
- There is no need to buy the trendiest clothes of the moment, unless you think they fit perfectly and you like to wear them. Before you buy the same Converse that everyone has, make sure they fit you, otherwise your urge to be noticed could turn into an opportunity to be laughed at.
- Whatever you wear, be sure of yourself. Do not constantly look in the windows and do not ask anyone to confirm your choice, otherwise you will pass for an insecure person.
- It is important to pay attention to your appearance, but remember that being perceived as someone desperate for popularity is worse than being someone who is not interested in looking after them. So if you don't really like wearing makeup, don't go overboard with your makeup. And if you really don't like that stand-up collar, don't adopt it just because everyone wears it that way.
- If you want to buy trendy clothes, but your budget doesn't allow it, visit the shops that offer trendy clothes at a low price, especially during the sales period. Visit for example Zara, H&M, Bershka or Pull & Bear for great deals.
Step 4. Take risks
To be popular, you need to create social occasions where you would normally feel uncomfortable. So be prepared to be brave.
- Take risks by introducing yourself to a person you don't know; if they invite you to a party, go even if you don't know most of the other guests.
- If you get used to taking risks - without ever putting yourself in danger, of course - you will certainly be more likely to get noticed.
Step 5. Don't be disinterested
Already! If you act like you're too cool for school, you're sure to get noticed, but not in a good way. While it's best to avoid becoming the teacher's cuddly and answer all questions correctly, taking part in classes actively and engaging will allow you to gain positive attention.
- Part of always looking ready and excited to live whatever life throws at you is smiling more often. You won't have to smile incessantly as if you were a maniac, but never forget to do it when you greet someone, even if your smile is not returned. It is likely that others will be more inclined to get to know you.
- If you go to high school, you may be at an age where everyone around you thinks it's cool to look bored and utterly aloof. Well, if you go against the grain, others will notice you even more.
Part 2 of 3: Be Sociable
Step 1. Be interested, not interesting
Don't pose as an interesting person to attract the attention of others; really interested in them. Ask them how they went to school or work, how their family is doing, how that situation you talked about has been resolved, and so on. Then, create a connection; it tells of experiences of known people who went through the same situation and how they resolved it.
- Stop thinking about yourself. Among all the typical characteristics of popular people there is one that they just can't do without: "empathy". What is your level of connection with others?
- Stop worrying about your looks, your voice, comparisons and start thinking about how others are doing.
Step 2. Be friendly
Popular people behave in a friendly way to almost everyone, not only their peers but also teachers, supervisors, the greengrocer, parents, children and in general anyone who proves to be minimally nice and kind to them.. Popular people are so friendly that they can have a conversation with just about anyone. There is no reason you can't do the same thing. Being friendly doesn't take a lot of effort, but it makes for a big impact.
Stay generic in speaking. You should always stick to "safe" arguments. Avoid uncomfortable conversations about religion or politics. When you express your point of view on a hot topic, you may lose your popularity status with those who do not share your opinion. Always keep a light tone
Step 3. Don't interfere
Being friendly is different from getting in where you aren't wanted. Respect people's privacy. Read your body language so you can see when your questions are turning into a cause for discomfort for the other person. If a person backs away, leans back, checks their phone too frequently, or was talking quietly to a friend before you arrived, this may not be the best time to interrupt or talk to them.
Don't invite yourself everywhere, don't stalk, don't brag, and don't interrupt. In other words, don't be annoying or harassing
Step 4. Help others
Popular people not only know everyone, but are also on good terms with everyone. This is because they are genuinely willing to help others and don't do it with the intention of being noticed. They do small things to establish these relationships, in addition to bigger things (like volunteering could be). Sometimes they lend a pen, close the neighbor's door if it is opened by a gust of wind, keep the door open to let the person who follows them through; but more often they are good listeners, ready to perceive the need and to help in case of need.
If you are really empathetic you always want the good of those around you. If you really can't do anything to help, sincerely wish everything goes well and everything works out
Step 5. Be yourself
It may seem like an obvious phrase, but popular people really live by this principle. You may think that to be popular you have to be attractive, a person full of talent; however, although these characteristics may make you a point of reference for many people, there are other very popular people who seem completely normal. At the same time, there are charming and talented people who are not popular at all.
- Remember that the only thing you need to be popular is a good assortment of personal and human skills, the rest is entirely up to you, regardless of what others think.
- Part of being yourself is in knowing yourself well enough and being able to laugh at yourself lightly. Show people that you are able to recognize your flaws and not take yourself too seriously, you will be able to make a good impression on those around you.
Step 6. Don't try too hard
Surprisingly, many popular people don't put too much effort into it. They are just themselves. If you try to be popular at all costs, this will be reflected in your actions and people will start to think that you are conceited or, even worse, an eccentric. Finding a group of friends with the same interests as you can be very helpful. As you get used to meeting new people, you can expand your reach to other people.
Part 3 of 3: Get Involved
Step 1. Join a team
You don't need to be Lebron James to be able to play on a basketball team. Joining a team is a great way to exercise and feel good about yourself, it allows you to broaden your horizons and make new friends. Even if you are only slightly inclined to the sport, give it a try, you will find that becoming a member of a team can really be worth it.
- Unlike your normal daily or school life, joining a team will expose you to many new people and learn to get along with varied and different characters and personalities.
- Joining a team will also improve your social life. You will have the opportunity to participate in fun group activities that precede or follow the matches.
- Being part of a team is a great way to jump into the fray and allow more people to get to know you.
Step 2. Join an association
This is also a great way to broaden your horizons and meet new people. In your football team, you may not have the opportunity to meet the same type of people you meet in the school newspaper, so participating in both activities could be a great idea, follow your passions and organize them according to your your agenda. Identify a subject in which you feel an interest or curiosity, and try to assume a role of responsibility after having achieved a sufficient degree of experience. This way you will feel more comfortable and will have the opportunity to get to know more people.
Don't worry if your chosen association isn't considered cool enough. Doing something you love and meeting new people will make you more popular anyway
Step 3. Get involved in school activities
You won't need to hang on teachers' lips or live with your hand up to be able to stand out in class. Just be friendly to peers who sit next to you, answer questions that are asked without being overbearing, and show general interest without appearing so involved that you overlook the social dynamics around you.
Being active in the classroom will lead to more people knowing your name and recognizing you when you start a conversation
Step 4. Maintain a number of different interests
Don't just be a good athlete or a good student of history. Do multiple tasks while keeping a couple of tricks up your sleeve. While you don't need to be constantly busy, to the point of running out of time for yourself, being involved in numerous activities will help you get to know, and recognize, spread your name, and meet a larger number of people.
Step 5. Get involved in your community activities
Not only will you have the opportunity to improve the lives of people in need, you will also learn to interact with a larger number of people, from different social backgrounds, economic situations and of different ages. The greater the number of people you meet, and with whom you establish good relationships, the greater your skills will become in meeting new people in the future and in being able to make them feel comfortable and well-liked.
Advice
- Realize that your popularity rating doesn't define you, it just puts you in the spotlight. So don't think that you have to become a completely new person when you become popular.
- While it's common in our society to be "mean" to those who are less popular, especially in middle school or high school, be careful not to lose friends for that reason or, at worst, your best friend.
- If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything. It might sound like a grandmother's advice, but it's still good advice. Even if people around you are denigrating someone, it is always better not to get into gossip. If asked for an opinion, you could remain neutral by saying, "He has always been nice to me, so I don't know" or "Maybe you have problems right now, who knows?".
- Try to appear like an open and helpful person. It is always a pleasure to have nice people around. Those who walk down the street with the expression "one whose cat just died" are not. Give people the opportunity to get close to you.
- Choose a sport! Normally, most of the popular girls do sports! Gymnastics and dance are the most famous. If you don't feel comfortable with these activities, you might want to try hockey, swimming, basketball, volleyball or even football. Most team sports have popular people in them. Also, athletic girls are usually always the most popular.
- Be friendly even to people you don't know. Smile, say hello, and if your hello is returned, ask them how they are. No matter where you are, make a good habit of chatting with strangers or people you barely know, even if only for a few minutes.
- If you use Facebook you can add your friends. Talk to them, but don't start by saying "I'm bored" because the most likely answer you would get would be "me too" and you wouldn't get anywhere. If you start the conversation, keep in mind what you want to say.
Warnings
- Guard your privacy. When everyone knows you, the chances of becoming the center of gossip increase. Think of the famous people who always have people around who want to spy on them to steal their personal information. You also need to be prepared to strike up a conversation with completely unfamiliar people while you are busy with your chores or when you are quietly reading on a park bench. It is part of the "package"; handle it with care!
- Remember that popularity has its good and bad sides; it can disappear very quickly if you start a new job or enter a new school. Each situation is different and sometimes it is necessary to start over.
- When you become popular you may not have much free time at your disposal.
- Don't feel disappointed if you fail. Popularity can be very simple for some and very difficult for others. There are many factors that could prevent a person from being liked and appreciated at first sight, but that doesn't mean the person is worth less.
- Don't act too much!
- Don't be disappointed if you're not the most popular person in school. Sometimes it's better to have good friends who take care of you and enjoy hanging out with than to be the cool kid at the Institute. After all, you always need good friends.
- Do not think too much. Being popular is more of a state of mind. If people notice that you are making too much effort to be popular, it will make your efforts in vain. Popularity ultimately only partially relates to how others view you. Your reputation may change over time; the only thing you can control is how you treat others yourself.
- Don't try to be, or seem, what you are not.
