At some moments in life, everyone has to experience a little sadness. Studies have shown that sadness lasts longer than many other emotions because we tend to pay more attention to it. Ruminating or reexamining our sad thoughts and feelings over and over can lead to depression and keep us from getting through the difficult time. There are many things you can do to be able to leave the sadness behind… read on to find out more.
Steps
Part 1 of 5: Ending the Sadness
Step 1. Cry
Some studies suggest that crying can have a relaxing effect on the body by releasing endorphins, natural feel-good chemicals. Crying can also activate the parasynthetic nervous system, which can help the body recover from stress and trauma.
- Numerous research indicates that crying is a useful reaction mechanism as it communicates your pain to others. It can also encourage people to support you.
- Dr. William Frey claims that crying removes toxins from the body. That may be true, although the number of toxins excreted through tears is negligible. Most of the tears are in fact reabsorbed in the nasal cavity.
- One study, in particular, suggested that feeling better after crying is related to one's culture. If your company, or your family, considers crying as something to be ashamed of, it may not be possible to benefit from it.
- Don't cry if you don't want to. Although popular wisdom indicates that not crying following trauma can be harmful, this may not be the case. Crying because you feel compelled to do so may prevent you from healing your pain.
Step 2. Exercise
Numerous studies confirm that movement releases endorphins and other chemicals that help fight sadness. One study showed that subjects who did moderate exercise over a 10-week period felt more energetic, calm, and positive than others. In addition, the benefits of movement were greater in those who felt depressed.
- Exercise will also give you a way to focus on a specific goal, temporarily distracting you from feeling sad.
- You don't need to run a marathon or spend all your days in the gym to enjoy the benefits of exercise. Even a light activity like gardening and walking can trigger positive effects.
Step 3. Smile
Multiple studies have shown that smiling, even when sad, can help us feel better. A genuine smile that also involves the muscles of the eyes (hence the saying "smile with the eyes") as well as those of the mouth acts best on the mood. If you feel sad then try to smile: even if you initially tend to do it reluctantly, you can still reap some positive benefits.
Research also indicates the opposite: People who frown when they feel sad are more prone to feel worse than those who don't, or can't
Step 4. Listen to some music
Listening to music can help you relax and find relief. Why you choose to listen is as important as what you choose to listen to. Songs you think are "beautiful if sad" from classical music can help you process sadness.
- Listening to songs that remind you of negative situations or experiences is not a good idea. It has been shown that your feelings of sadness could even get worse. Prefer music that you like - this is the most effective way to overcome dark times.
- If you are feeling stressed out by feelings of sadness, the British Academy of Sound Therapy has created a playlist of the "most relaxing songs in the world" according to science. Among the many recommended pieces there are some by Enya, Airstream, Marconi Union and Coldplay.
Step 5. Take a warm bath
Physical heat has been proven to have a calming effect. Take a warm bath or shower to help you relax. Feeling sad could also benefit.
Part 2 of 5: Overcoming the Sadness
Step 1. Acknowledge your feelings
Being sad is normal, sometimes even healthy. Research indicates that experiencing controversial and negative feelings is essential for mental well-being. Many studies show that those who apologize for their feelings, as well as those who repress them, actually intensify those negative emotions.
Try to acknowledge your feelings without judging yourself about them. It's easy to think "It's not that important, so why be so sad?". Instead, accept what you feel for who it is. It will help you manage your feelings
Step 2. Distract yourself
It is known that ruminating or continually rethinking what makes you sad hinders the healing process. Distract yourself from obsessive thoughts to be able to overcome sadness.
- Engage in enjoyable activities. Doing something you enjoy will help you get over your sadness, even though you may not initially feel like doing it. Go for a walk. Take an art class. Find a new hobby. Learn to play classical guitar. Whatever activity you benefit from, take the time to dedicate yourself to it.
- Interact with friends. Interacting with loved ones can increase the body's production of oxytocin. Go to the movies, have coffee with someone or take a blind date. Research confirms that isolating yourself will only make your depressive feelings worse, including sadness.
Step 3. Practice mindfulness
Mindfulness is based on acknowledging your own experiences and accepting them without judging them or yourself. Research indicates that practicing mindfulness can actually change the brain's response to sadness. It can also help you overcome it faster.
Since mindfulness focuses on staying in the present moment, it can help you not to ruminate
Step 4. Try meditation
A popular meditation technique is mindful meditation. Numerous studies have shown that it reduces brain responses to negative emotional stimuli.
- Mindfulness meditation can also relieve symptoms of anxiety and depression.
- A simple meditation practice takes about 15 minutes. Find a quiet, comfortable place. Sit in a chair or on the floor, with your legs crossed. Loosen tight clothes and get into a comfortable position.
- Focus on one aspect of your breath of your choice. You could opt for the rising and falling of the chest as you breathe, or the sensation caused by the air passing through your nostrils. Focus your concentration on the chosen element.
- Inhale slowly through the nose. Allow your abdomen to relax and expand as you fill your lungs. Then slowly exhale through your mouth.
- Keep breathing as you expand your focus. Note your feelings; they could include noticing your heartbeat or feeling clothes on your skin.
- Recognize such feelings, but don't judge them. If you find yourself distracted, focus on your breathing again.
Step 5. Practice yoga or tai chi
Dedicate yourself to yoga or tai chi, disciplines that can relieve stress and improve mood. Such effects could derive from the emphasis on "self-awareness". Many studies have confirmed that yoga and tai chi help relieve both physical and psychological pain.
Compared to practicing alone, taking a class in the company of other people can bring more relief
Part 3 of 5: Recognizing and Managing the Sadness Caused by Detachment
Step 1. Understand what kind of detachment can cause pain
Sadness can result from the loss of something or someone dear to us. Faced with detachment, each individual reacts differently. Among the most common situations of posting we find:
- The death of a loved one: of a friend, relative or partner.
- The serious illness of a loved one.
- The end of a relationship.
- The death of an animal dear to us.
- The abandonment of our home.
- The loss of a job or a business.
- The loss of an important object or to which we are romantically linked.
- The loss of our physical abilities.
Step 2. Recognize natural reactions to detachment
In the face of a detachment or a loss, everyone reacts in their own way; there is no "right" approach. Among the most common reactions we can include:
- Disbelief. Accepting what happened may not be easy. You may experience thoughts like "This can't be true" or "These things don't happen to people like me."
- Confusion. Immediately after the loss, you may find it difficult to concentrate. You may also have amnesia or be unable to express thoughts or feelings.
- Numbness. Initially you may experience feelings of emotional numbness. Your brain may in fact try to protect you from the feeling of overwhelm.
- Anxiety. After a loss, especially if it is sudden, it is normal to feel anxious, nervous, or worried.
- Relief. Such emotion can cause considerable shame, although it is an equally natural response. If a loved one has finally found peace after long suffering, you may feel relieved. Don't judge yourself for such feelings.
- Physical symptoms. Following a detachment, you may experience a wide variety of physical symptoms, including feeling tired or out of breath or having a headache or nausea. You may also suffer from sleep disturbances or constantly feel sleepy.
Step 3. Don't judge your feelings
When faced with the loss of a beloved object or animal, many feel embarrassed because they believe it is not correct to feel so pained. Avoid thinking about what is right or wrong to do and accept your pain. It is never wrong to mourn the loss of something or someone dear to you.
- Some research confirms that the death of your pet can be as painful as that of a family member.
- You may find it interesting to read this article.
Step 4. Understand the different stages of detachment
Most of us experience five stages: rejection, anger, negotiation, depression, and acceptance. Not everyone goes through these stages in this order. For many people, detachment causes cyclical phases that fade over time.
- These are non-prescriptive stages that should in no way tell you how you should feel. Use them as a way to identify and deal with your feelings. Never feel guilty about how you are experiencing the detachment.
- The steps may not occur separately. You may experience several overlapping or not experience some; there is no normal practice. How you live and cope with detachment is a natural process that affects only you.
Step 5. Acknowledge the rejection
Denial is often one of the first reactions to loss or bad news. It commonly comes in the form of emotional falling asleep, and can include thoughts such as "It's not really happening", "I can't handle it" or even "It's okay".
- During the rejection phase, a common thought is the wish that it turns out to be "all a dream".
- Don't confuse emotional numbness or shock with "disinterest". Denial comes from the mind's attempt to protect you from intense emotion as you adjust to the new situation. Even if you love someone deeply, you may react by denying or underestimating the detachment.
Step 6. Recognize anger
Anger is another natural reaction to a loss. It is a feeling that can manifest itself with thoughts such as "This is not right" or "Why did this happen to me?". You may be looking for something or someone to blame for your loss. Anger is a common response when you feel you have lost control of a situation. It is also a widespread reaction to the feeling of being hurt.
If you have an angry reaction, contact an experienced therapist or support group. It may be difficult to deal with it on your own. It's important to talk to someone who doesn't judge your anger and can instead help you get over it
Step 7. Recognize the negotiation stage
Sometimes, following a loss, you may wish you did differently. The thoughts involved could be similar to: "To prevent it I could have done …". The resulting feeling will be an intense sense of guilt. You may also fantasize about going back in time to act differently and avoid painful loss.
It is also important at this stage to seek help. If you can't get over the guilt, you may not be able to help you heal. Talk to an experienced therapist or get support from a support group
Step 8. Recognize depression
Depression is a widespread reaction to detachment. It may only last for a short time, or it may take longer to heal. It is important to seek professional help to help your recovery: if neglected, depression usually tends to get worse. Symptoms of depression include:
- Fatigue.
- Sleep disorders.
- Sense of guilt, helplessness or worthlessness.
- Feelings of fear or sadness.
- Sense of disconnection from others.
- Headache, cramps, muscle aches and other physical pains.
- Lack of pleasure in doing the things you usually enjoy.
- Jumps from your "normal" mood (increased irritability, fixations, etc.).
- Food disorders.
- Suicidal thoughts or plans.
- When dealing with detachment, it may not be easy to distinguish sadness from clinical depression. People who experience severe loss may have any of the symptoms described. Nonetheless, suicidal thoughts or plans make them more prone to a diagnosis of clinical depression. If you have suicidal thoughts, seek medical help right away.
Step 9. Seek help from friends and family
It may be helpful to talk about the separation with those closest to you. Exposing your feelings of sadness can help you feel less intense.
Step 10. Give yourself time
Healing from the pain of a loss by reaching the last phase of detachment, "acceptance", may take some time. Be patient and kind to yourself.
Part 4 of 5: Recognizing and Treating Clinical Depression
Step 1. Compare clinical depression to sadness
Clinical depression goes beyond a sense of sadness or "feeling down". It is a serious mental illness that needs to be treated. Depression is unlikely to get better on its own.
- Sadness is a natural human emotion. It can be the response to a loss or the result of an unpleasant or uncomfortable experience. Commonly, sadness or "feeling down" fades on its own over time and does not usually occur consistently; sadness in fact tends to come and go. It is often triggered by a particular experience or event.
- Clinical depression outweighs sadness. It is not a simple feeling that can be "overcome". It rarely decreases over time. It is usually almost constantly present; furthermore, there may be no particular triggering events or causes. Depression can be so overwhelming that it interferes with normal daily activities.
Step 2. Recognize the symptoms of clinical depression
Clinical depression can manifest itself in different ways in different individuals. You may not have all the symptoms of the condition. Symptoms usually interfere with the activities of daily living and can cause severe suffering and dysfunction. If you frequently experience five or more of the following symptoms, you may be suffering from clinical depression:
- Changes in sleep patterns.
- Changes in eating patterns.
- Inability to concentrate, "sense of confusion".
- Fatigue or lack of energy.
- Loss of interest in the things you usually enjoy.
- Irritability or restlessness.
- Weight loss or weight gain.
- Feelings of hopelessness, grief or worthlessness.
- Physical aches, headaches, cramps, and other physical symptoms with no clear cause.
Step 3. Understand what causes depression
Depression has many causes, and researchers are still not entirely sure how it works. Past trauma could cause changes in the way the brain handles stress and fear. Numerous studies suggest that clinical depression may be partly genetic. Changes in life, such as the loss of a loved one or a divorce, can trigger an episode of severe depression.
- Clinical depression is a complex pathology. In part, it could be caused by the malfunction of some neurotransmitters, including serotonin and dopamine. Medicines can help regulate these chemicals and relieve depression.
- The abuse of harmful substances, including drugs or alcohol, is strongly linked to depression.
- Research suggests that gay and bisexual people are at greater risk of suffering from depression. This could be due to the lack of social and personal support systems.
Step 4. Talk to your doctor
If you are experiencing symptoms of depression and find that they are interfering with your life, consider seeing your doctor. He may prescribe specific medications to help regulate those brain hormones that affect mood.
- Honestly describe each symptom in detail. Antidepressant drugs are many and varied. Your specific symptoms will help your doctor determine which ones are best for your needs.
- Individual body chemistry can react to medicines in many different ways. With your doctor's support, you may need to experiment with taking more than one antidepressant before finding the one that works best for you. If you feel no benefit after a few months of treatment, talk to your doctor.
- Do not substitute or stop taking an antidepressant without first consulting your doctor. It could also seriously affect your health and mood.
- If treatment still doesn't work, consider seeing a psychiatrist. A psychiatrist is a doctor with specific training. He will be able to help you perfect your treatment and identify the most suitable treatments for you.
Step 5. Get help from a mental health therapist
Being influenced by multiple factors, it is important that depression is treated by an experienced professional. A mental health therapist can help you understand and manage your emotions. Treatment that includes psychotherapy - in addition to taking antidepressant drugs - is usually more effective.
- There are two common myths related to depression. One is that you simply have to "react". The other argues that asking for help is a symptom of weakness. They are both false: admitting that you need help managing your health is a sign of strength and self-love.
- There are multiple categories of mental health professionals. As a rule, psychiatrists and psychiatric nurses are the only ones authorized to prescribe certain types of drugs. They can also offer therapeutic support.
- Psychologists hold degrees in psychology (clinical, educational, therapeutic) and specialized training in therapy. Their fees are usually lower than psychiatrists, but more expensive than other options.
- Graduates in Social Work Sciences. If properly trained, social workers can also conduct psychological therapies. They can also help you find good sources of support where you live. They usually collaborate with local social services and university medical centers.
- Psychotherapists, including family mediators and marriage counselors. These are psychology or medicine graduates who then embarked on an additional training path. They are qualified to manage problems within couples and families. Sometimes they can provide individual therapy.
- Clinical consultants. They have a degree in counseling (eg psychology or sociology) and have also participated in specific training programs in the same subject. They initially work under the supervision of more experienced counselors and psychologists, and then practice independently, especially locally.
Step 6. Talk to your doctor
Find out if and what kind of mental health support is provided free of charge in the area where you live. To date, some psychiatrists also provide psychological therapy, and some medical facilities also offer group therapies, albeit often aimed only at the most serious cases.
Step 7. Stay in touch with family and friends
Isolating yourself from social relationships is a common symptom of depression. Often, however, the company of the people we care about allows us to feel better: they can in fact make us a gift of their love and their support.
You may not feel like seeing or interacting with someone. However, it is important to encourage yourself to do it anyway. Isolation could make your depressive state worse
Step 8. Eat healthily
You cannot "cure" depression simply by changing your diet. However, you can choose those foods that promote a feeling of well-being.
- Go for complex carbohydrates. Whole-grain pasta, bread and rice, as well as legumes, are good sources of complex carbohydrates that can make you feel full longer and help you keep blood sugar levels under control.
- Avoid sugars and simple carbohydrates. They may provide you with a temporary energy spike, which will be followed by a drop that can make depressive symptoms worse.
- Eat fruits and vegetables. Both are packed with nutrients, including vitamin C and beta-carotene, antioxidants that can help you fight free radicals that disrupt bodily functioning. Try incorporating fresh fruits and vegetables into most of your meals.
- Get enough protein. Numerous studies indicate that a large protein intake can improve mental clarity. Protein can also have a beneficial effect on mood.
- Incorporates omega-3 fatty acids. They are available in nuts and many natural oils, including flaxseed and soybean oils, and in leafy green vegetables. They are also contained in so-called fatty fish, for example tuna, salmon and sardines. Research suggests that getting more fatty acids may slightly protect us from depression.
Step 9. Sleep well
Depression often disturbs our sleep habits. It is important to get about eight hours of sleep a night. Try to establish healthy sleep patterns, such as going to bed at the same time all the time and avoiding TV in the last hour of the day.
- Those with chronic insomnia are at greater risk of developing clinical depression.
- Sleep apnea, diseases that disturb respiratory activity during sleep, are also linked to clinical depression.
Step 10. Exercise
If you are depressed, you may not feel like going out and exercising. However, many studies have shown that exercise can improve mood. Try to get at least 30 minutes of moderate physical activity every day. Intense exercise at least twice a week can also help.
- Some research suggests that regular exercise reduces the risk of depression.
- Obese people may be more likely to become depressed. Scientists don't fully understand this connection, but they confirm that exercise can fight both obesity and disease.
Part 5 of 5: Recognizing and Treating Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
Step 1. Recognize the symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder
It is a type of depression caused by a chemical imbalance due to seasonal changes. In some places more than others, usually those furthest from the equator, the hours of daylight are reduced during the autumn and winter months. This can change body chemistry and cause symptoms very similar to those of clinical depression. Such symptoms include:
- Low energy or fatigue.
- Difficulty concentrating.
- Increased appetite.
- A desire for isolation or solitude.
- Sleep disturbances, excessive sleepiness.
- Seasonal Affective Disorder usually begins between 18 and 30 years of age.
- If you suffer from SAD, you may experience an increased craving for carbohydrates. As a result, you may gain weight.
Step 2. Seek professional help
The treatment of Seasonal Affective Disorder is very similar to that of clinical depression. Antidepressant medications and professional therapy are usually sufficient to treat this condition.
Step 3. Try light therapy
Light therapy can help regulate our biological clock. Search the web and find out which tools are suitable. A light therapy lamp should have 10,000 lux (the lux unit refers to the intensity of the light).
- Before any purchase, make sure that the selected lamp is suitable for treating Seasonal Affective Disorder. Some devices used to treat skin conditions emit too much ultraviolet and may cause eye damage.
- Light therapy is usually a safe treatment. However, if you have bipolar disorder, it is advisable to see your doctor for a thorough consultation.
- Light therapy can also cause complications for those suffering from lupus, skin cancer, or certain eye conditions.
Step 4. Expose yourself to more sunlight
Exposure to natural sunlight can improve your mood. Open the curtains and spend more time outdoors whenever possible.
Step 5. Light up your environment
Paint the walls in light colors, so that natural light is reflected more. Fun and bright decorations can also help improve your mood.
Step 6. Enjoy the winter
Whenever possible, try to emphasize the pleasant aspects of winter. Curl up in front of a fireplace. Roast some goodies in the flames. Make yourself a hot chocolate (in moderation of course).
Step 7. Exercise
As with clinical depression, you can relieve the symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder through exercise. If you live in a cold climate, try a winter sport like skiing or snowshoeing.
Step 8. Consider using natural remedies
However, always consult your doctor before starting any natural cure; some treatments may interfere with the medications taken or aggravate existing medical conditions.
- Try regulating your sleep with melatonin. Melatonin supplements can help you regulate sleep cycles that may be disturbed by Seasonal Affective Disorder.
- Try taking St. John's wort. Some studies show that St. John's wort is able to relieve the symptoms of average depression. St. John's wort can limit the effectiveness of medical prescriptions, including birth control pills and heart and cancer medications. St. John's wort cannot be taken by those taking SSRI or tricyclic antidepressants (TCAs) or any other anti-depression medication. Otherwise it could cause the onset of serotonin syndrome. Do not take St. John's wort without first talking to your doctor.
Step 9. Take a warm vacation
If you live in a location where winter sunlight is scarce, consider visiting a sunny country. Places like the Caribbean or the Canary Islands often enjoy brighter sunlight even during the winter months.
Advice
- Relaxing and having fun time is essential for you to feel better.
- Help other people with a gesture that is meaningful to them. Most of the time, by helping others, you also generate happiness for yourself. Giving is a perfect way to be able to smile.
- If you are religious or spiritual, find solace in your traditions. They can help you overcome sadness.
Warnings
- Don't substitute or stop taking an antidepressant without first consulting your doctor. You could be severely impacted on your health and mood, and even experience suicidal thoughts.
- If sadness makes you want to hurt yourself or others, or if you have suicidal thoughts or plans, seek help immediately. There are many institutions you can turn to. There are many telephone services for the prevention of suicide, for example that provided by the Roman hospital Sant'Andrea (06 33777740). You can also call the emergency number 118.
