Is there a friend or family member who has failed a class exam or question? It is not easy to get high marks in the most difficult subjects, but it is not an impossible task if you put a little effort into it. When someone close to you performs poorly in studying, try to cheer them up and encourage them not to give up. Learn to reach out to him so that he can deal with this situation and have hope for the future.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Giving Your Support
Step 1. Give this person a chance to let off steam
Sometimes, when someone we care about has low spirits, the best thing to do is listen to them. Therefore, give those who are ill the opportunity to complain about their study problems. It will be incredibly therapeutic for him to express his difficulties. Also, by allowing him to let off steam, you will show affection for him.
- Listen to him with participation by turning in his direction and looking him in the eye. Nod or use appropriate phrases, such as "uh-huh", to show that you are paying attention to his words.
- When he has finished speaking, try to reflect on what he said by highlighting his mood. For example, you might say, "You seem really upset about your grade on the assignment." Then give him a chance to continue letting off steam. It is not yet the right time to help him "solve" the problem.
Step 2. Tell him how you got through a critical period
To offer your support in this difficult situation without sounding presumptuous, try talking to him about a difficult time you have. It could be about your studies or another obstacle you have had to overcome. Just make sure your message is clear: if he keeps fighting, he can successfully face any adversity.
At first, you may be frightened by the idea of opening up and telling someone about a problem you have faced. However, keep in mind that by sharing your personal experience, you will point out that everyone can have difficulties in life and that it is possible to overcome them, however insurmountable they seem
Step 3. Offer to help him out as best you can
Even if you won't fix his problem, there is probably something you can do to help him. Are you well versed in the subject where it goes wrong? Maybe you can suggest how to improve. Do you have a good study method? Maybe you could give him some tips so that he can better prepare himself.
Be aware that they may not even want your help. Instead of thinking about how you can help him, simply ask him "Is there anything I can do?" Then act on his answer. If he accepts, ask him to explain what his needs are. This way, you won't run the risk of saying something inappropriate, passing for an arrogant person
Step 4. Remind him what his strengths are
Encourage him to believe in himself. It is normal for self-esteem to take a hard hit after a bad grade. Therefore, find the right time to give him a sincere compliment on some of his qualities. Remind him of his strengths despite failure at school.
You might say to him, "I know how bad it is to take 4 in math. Fortunately, you don't have to worry about English. You're the best at this subject!". Make sure that the compliment is sincere and that your friend realizes that you are not giving it to him just to cheer him up
Step 5. Stand beside him
If he's upset about a bad grade, the most support you can give him is your presence. Just be close to him. Offer him a shoulder to cry on if he wants to. It is not your job to fix his situation or improve it in some way. It is up to him to deal with it, but he will certainly appreciate your support and the fact that you can admit how unpleasant it is.
Part 2 of 3: Encourage him to distract himself and raise the mood
Step 1. Offer him a day trip
If a friend or family member has just been told that they got a bad grade, you could cheer them up by suggesting an impromptu trip. If you have a driving license, choose an interesting destination to see in the space of a day. If you don't drive, use your creativity and think of a nice place to visit in the city.
By improvising an unexpected spin, you will allow him to momentarily distract himself from the bad news. Plus, it's a great way to break the boredom of routine and have fun
Step 2. Watch a comic movie or video
As the old adage goes: "Laughter is the best medicine". Make your friend giggle with laughter even if only for a few moments. In this way, he will find the good mood after receiving a bad report card. Also, according to some studies, laughter relieves tension and is good for health.
Browse YouTube for funny animal or baby videos. Alternatively, turn on the TV and watch a comedy movie. Your goal is to help him feel lighter and relieve some stress
Step 3. Take a walk in the green
Has your friend locked himself in his room mulling over the bad grades he got? A quick and inexpensive distraction that will allow him to improve his mood is to get out. If you can, choose a place surrounded by nature rather than a destination in the city. According to some research, walking in the green reduces the production of cortisol (the stress hormone).
Step 4. Dance
Suggest that your friend dance to help him move his body and circulate the endorphins. Collect his favorite songs on a CD and show up at his home ready to rock to the beat of the music! Besides being great exercise, dance can lift your mood and fuel your self-esteem.
Plus, the dance is liberating. Your friend may more easily express anger, frustration, and disappointment by releasing these feelings with body movements
Part 3 of 3: Increase Your Motivation
Step 1. Tell them to try again
Remind him that sooner or later everyone faces obstacles along the path of life, but what really matters is to react. Give importance to approaching school with a positive attitude and being persistent. Try to emphasize dedication more than skills. Not everyone is a model student, but they can work hard and do their best.
Also try using some encouraging quotes that encourage him to move forward with greater optimism. For example, a famous proverb says: "When the caterpillar thought the world was about to end, it turned into a butterfly."
Step 2. Reassure him by saying that his grades do not reflect his identity
Just because he went wrong on a task or question doesn't mean he isn't able to recover and make progress. A bad grade reveals only a few momentary gaps in a certain field, but it can improve with study and practice. It reflects what he knew at a given moment.
- For example, you might say, "I know it's not very clear how the product of fractions works right now, but I also know you'll study hard to get a better grade on your next math test!"
- Alternatively, you can say, "I know you're not happy with your grade, but that doesn't mean you're stupid. You don't understand this concept."
Step 3. Help him set achievable goals
As a friend, you can give him courage after a bad grade by suggesting that he set a goal that will allow him to improve his academic performance. This way, by having something to focus on and make progress, he will be able to gain self-confidence.
Keep in mind that his goal must be realistic and attainable, don't lead him to make a hole in the water. For example, if he had 4 in a subject, it makes no sense for him to try to get 8 by the end of the next term. Maybe he can aim to turn the 4 into a 6 or 6 and ½, which is more reasonable and doable
Step 4. Encourage them to improve their organization and time management skills
In some cases, you may be dealing with a very smart guy who, however, has a hard time finishing his homework on time or who completely neglects to do it. In such circumstances, he may learn some time management and organization strategies that allow him to improve. Some easy-to-follow tips include:
- Use a diary to write the check;
- Use a different color for each binder or notebook in order to organize in all subjects;
- Try to finish homework at least a day or two before the deadline;
- Plan a daily and weekly schedule;
- Pack everything he needs to be a diligent and scrupulous student in his backpack;
- Avoid being disturbed or distracted in the space where he studies;
- Studying at regular times and planning short breaks (for example, after 30 minutes you can take a 5-minute break);
- Establish a method for taking notes;
- Adopt a reward system that incentivizes him to finish homework.
Step 5. Recommend him to start communicating with the teachers
Sometimes, teachers have no idea whether a teaching method is effective or not. Encourage your friend to talk to the professors about their shortcomings. They may give him additional exercises so that he can assimilate a concept well or even suggest some online learning tools to practice at home.
- You may also need to get used to being more involved in class and asking questions during the lesson. Practice at home and encourage him to raise his hand and ask questions that will help him understand a topic better.
- Suggest that she review old class assignments with the teacher to find out exactly what her gaps are or the steps she has the most trouble with. You may also want to advise him to ask the teacher if he thinks he should take private lessons.
