Do you want to strengthen your personality? Would you like to become more direct and decisive? Many people would like to develop strong character traits, such as assertiveness, leadership skills and resilience. They are quite coveted characteristics, because those who express them are seen by most as a bold, sociable and spontaneous type, who usually occupies high positions from which his opinions are respected. Learn to appreciate various personality traits and make yours stronger.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Understanding the Personality Traits
Step 1. Understand what is meant by personality
The personality, in psychological terms, groups together the individual characteristics, typical of a person. They include the way you think, feel and behave. It is a combination of qualities that determines how a person reacts in certain situations.
For example, some personality traits are honesty, volubility, extroversion, sociability, and impulsiveness
Step 2. Consider the fundamental theories about personality
There are different theories that explain how a personality develops and why some people have certain characteristics and others don't. Many are based on the belief that personality depends on biological or environmental factors (see the concept of "nature versus culture"). Once a personality develops, its traits usually express themselves stably over time.
- Allport's theory holds that personality traits are biologically determined, but are formed as a result of experiences lived in the environmental context.
- Eysenck's theory explains that personality can be understood by observing some aspects that belong to the overall behavior of an individual.
Step 3. Appreciate your personality traits as unique
Realize that each side of your character has its own value. Sometimes it can be difficult to recognize subtle qualities, as strong characteristics are the ones that dominate. These subtly perceivable traits, such as predictability, generosity, and the ability to participate in other people's feelings, are as important as the more visible ones.
Do not forget that the less obvious personality traits can manifest themselves in a very strong way, in certain situations or certain roles. For example, empathy and seriousness are indispensable in the most important events in life, such as weddings and funerals
Step 4. Value other people's personality traits
Realize that not everyone has a broad spectrum of character traits. It can be useful to be able to appreciate the character differences between people when you work in a team or if you are a manager. By valuing milder - but strong - characteristics such as empathy and generosity, you have the opportunity to strengthen relationships and facilitate teamwork.
- The most effective leaders and managers know how to appreciate, value and make the most of various personality types.
- For example, if you notice that someone on your team speaks little but is very knowledgeable about a certain subject, have them dedicate themselves to producing programs and everything needed for a project in a detailed manner. This way, you will put his skills to good use without stressing him.
Part 2 of 3: Develop Assertiveness
Step 1. Understand how assertiveness is a strength
Assertiveness is the ability to express one's opinions or to assert one's needs in a diplomatic manner, without being aggressive or defensive; it is often considered the opposite of passivity or shyness. To be assertive, you need to consider some aspects that include the ability to:
- Make requests to others (such as favors), delegate, ask for help, and express needs or wishes.
- Displaying negative reactions, such as disagreement, disapproval, a desire to be alone, and rejecting other people's requests.
- Communicate positive emotions, such as pride or interest, and compliment others.
- Challenge authority and certain habits by respectfully asking why. This demonstrates one's involvement in making changes and a desire to share power in decision making.
- Starting, continuing and stopping conversing with others by showing self-confidence, but also changing the subject and sharing opinions and experiences.
- Deal with daily hassles productively, before they generate anger.
Step 2. Identify areas of your life where you want to be more assertive
Maybe you would like to behave more assertively at work or in the family context. Spend some time reflecting on areas in your life that could benefit if you were worth more. Perhaps it would be helpful to think about the difficulties you are facing right now.
- For example, you would like to tell your boss that you are overworked and would like to be able to delegate some tasks to another member of the group.
- Probably, if your partner does something that bothers you on time, you would like to have the ability to express your frustration with grace and discretion.
Step 3. Try to be assertive with others
Describe the situation or problem, trying to be as specific as possible about how you see things. Be careful not to formulate sentences in the second person, otherwise you may appear to be using an accusatory tone and not be interpreted in the right way. Use first-person sentences. Express your opinion firmly, maintaining eye contact and self-control. Describe clearly and in detail how you would like to change the situation.
- For example, if a friend repeatedly cancels plans you set up together, you might say, "When I see that you don't stick to your schedule, I get discouraged and feel bad. In the future, please only plan if you intend to keep your word. otherwise notify me in time ".
- Be reasonable in your requests, and take into account the needs or constraints of the other person. Be open to comments and willing to make any necessary changes.
Step 4. Practice role-playing
This is an exercise where you can ask someone to play the part of the person you really need to talk to. This is a great way to train yourself to have a strong personality before actually interacting with someone. Challenge yourself by assertively saying everything you intend to express.
- It will help you go through the thorniest parts of the conversation, increasing your confidence when the time comes when you need to deliver the actual speech.
- This exercise is as beneficial to you as it is to the person you are actually going to talk to. It will give you a more complete understanding of your communication style, allowing you to modify the conversation based on what works and what is not worth pointing out.
Part 3 of 3: Developing Leadership Skills and Resilience
Step 1. Understand how leadership is a strong personality trait
It is about the ability to lead, motivate, inspire others, challenge yourself and achieve goals. It may seem completely natural to some people, but it is also possible to learn how to develop this ability. The leader doesn't just lead a large group of people; you can use this skill to produce a positive influence on other colleagues of your same level, for example, by shifting conversations to more constructive or interesting topics.
- It can also help you gain the trust of colleagues or your coordinators.
- For example, even if you normally hold back, listening to the interventions of the various people participating in the conversations, you may find yourself in a group in which no one speaks: in this case, a leader does nothing but stimulate the group to discuss some topic, which be it politics or a new television series.
Step 2. Try activities that strengthen your leadership skills
There is no recipe for becoming a leader. Therefore, it would be advisable to improve a series of skills that lead you to develop this ability. You could volunteer and try to coach a team, join an organizing committee in the workplace, join special projects about conducting certain office tasks, or find a mentor who has experience leading and exercising his charisma over others. Use these opportunities to develop the following skills:
- Motivate others by giving direction.
- Feel comfortable accepting certain assignments and taking responsibility for any mistakes.
- Propose changes.
- Organize others, for example during events or meetings.
- Learning from frustration and failure.
- Acquire excellent listening skills to pay attention to the opinions and needs of the group.
- Become flexible on schedule changes if needed.
Step 3. Build resilience
It is about the ability to cope with stress and adapt to change. For example, you may be resilient if, by discovering that you have a chronic illness, you are able to maintain an optimistic attitude and encourage those around you. It appears that resilience is a natural skill in some people, but it is also possible to train it. If you have a resilient personality, you can be able to:
- Create and carry out realistic programs.
- Trust your abilities.
- Communicate effectively and solve problems.
- Manage strong emotions and impulses.
Step 4. Commit to building strong relationships
Even the most resilient person can have a hard time coping with stressful situations. By having strong relationships, you will be able to hold on with greater momentum during difficult times. Try to nurture relationships with friends, family, or within your community. Thanks to these kinds of relationships, you will have the opportunity to create a strong support network which, in turn, can increase your resilience.
Step 5. Get a resilient mindset
Those who do not have a strong and flexible personality may find it difficult to find solutions in difficult times. In these cases, it seems that the situation lasts indefinitely and that there is nothing to be done. Strengthen your personality by learning to rely on yourself. Admit that you probably won't be able to change the circumstances, but you certainly can change the way you interpret them.
For example, if you are going through a tough period of professional training right after starting a new job, remember that this moment will end and you will be ready to give your best in the new work environment. The formative period is only temporary
Step 6. Take action to resolve your problems
If you feel stuck and feel like your life has been reduced to the same boring routine, do something to change it, especially if you're having a hard time. When complications arise, you will probably be tempted to let it all go, getting yourself overwhelmed. However, it is important to analyze each problem, taking action where possible. The feeling of turning the page will help you recover and feel that you are in control of the situation.
