4 Ways to Educate a Child with Attention Deficit Syndrome

2024 Author: Samantha Chapman | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 09:13

Educating a child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) could be a difficult task, as it requires the adoption of particular educational methods, different from those used for his peers. Otherwise you would run the risk of continually justifying his behavior, or giving him too severe punishments, while in reality you have to find a compromise between the two opposing systems. Experts in the management of ADHD children confirm that their education involves some difficulties; however, parents, teachers, and other carers can achieve positive results by arming themselves with perseverance and patience.

Steps

Method 1 of 4: Establish Habits and Organization

Step 1. Try to address the basic organizational needs of the family

Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder have some difficulties in planning, cognitive flexibility, time management and other daily activities. Establishing a well-structured organizational system in your family's daily life is essential. In other words, routine planning would help you avoid resorting to punishment, because it would eliminate some of the reasons that lead your child to behave improperly.

• Many inadequate attitudes of the child could be triggered by poor organization that generates total chaos. For example, some of the major conflicts between a child with ADHD and his parents revolve around housework, cleaning his room, and doing homework. These problems can be avoided if the child is surrounded by a solid structure and organization capable of transmitting good habits to help him achieve the set goals.
• These habits usually include morning routines, homework or bedtime, and set times for playing video games.
• Make sure your expectations are "explicit". “Clean your room” is a vague request and the child with ADHD may get confused and have no idea where to start and how to proceed, easily losing focus. It would be preferable to divide the request into smaller and more limited tasks: "Collect the toys", "Vacuum the carpet", "Clean the hamster cage", "Put the clothes in the closet".

Step 2. Establish clear routines and rules

Make sure you set a set of specific rules and expectations for the whole family and housekeeping. Children with ADHD are unlikely to be able to grasp poorly marked indications. Clearly and accurately communicate your expectations and daily tasks.

• After establishing the weekly work schedule, for example, post it in your child's room. You can use a whiteboard and make it more enjoyable by using paints, stickers, and other decorative elements. On the program, specify and highlight all the details, so that your child can have a more detailed view.
• Establish routines for all daily activities, such as schoolwork, which usually create significant problems for children with ADHD. Make sure every day that your child records homework in a diary and always does it at the same time and place. Check it out before it starts to unfold and check it out after it has finished.

Step 3. Break the more challenging tasks into smaller goals

Parents need to understand that the lack of organization that characterizes children with ADHD is often driven by visual overload. As a result, they feel the need for a large project, such as cleaning the room or folding and storing clean clothes, to be broken down into many smaller tasks, assigned one at a time.

• In the case of clothes, for example, ask your child to first find his socks and put them aside. You can come up with some kind of game by putting a CD and challenging your child to find all the socks and store them in the right drawer before the first song ends. After he has finished and you have praised him for being good, you can ask him to collect and store his underwear, pajamas, etc. until all the work is done.
• Dividing the project into smaller objectives to be carried out over an extended time not only prevents your child from assuming incorrect attitudes caused by his sense of frustration, but also offers you the opportunity to praise him, giving him the opportunity to have a positive experience. The more the child succeeds in his intent and is gratified, the more he begins to recognize himself as a successful person, receiving the boost of self-esteem necessary to be more successful in the future. After all, success brings success!
• You may need to guide your child in carrying out daily tasks. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder prevents him from maintaining proper concentration and doing boring tasks. This does not mean that your child can shirk his duties, but the expectation that he can carry them out on his own may or may not be realistic … it depends a lot on him. It is better to patiently guide him in carrying out his tasks and make it more positive, rather than expecting too much and unleashing frustration that would become a cause for arguments.

Step 4. Get organized

Establishing routines helps convey habits that will last a lifetime, but a solid organizational system is required to stick to these routines. Help your child organize their room. Remember that children with ADHD feel overloaded because they notice everything immediately, so the more they are able to categorize their personal items, the better they are able to manage the excess of stimuli.

• Children with ADHD do well with cube-shaped containers, shelves, wall hooks, and appreciate having someone help them categorize items and reduce confusion.
• The use of color coding, images and shelf labels also helps to reduce visual overload. Do not forget that children with ADHD are victims of an acute state of sensory overload, therefore the categorization of their belongings can help them manage the excess of stimuli from the outside.
• Eliminate unnecessary items. In addition to the general organization, getting rid of objects that distract your child's attention will help make the environment more relaxing. This doesn't necessarily mean making the room bare. However, getting rid of the toys and clothes that you no longer use and cleaning the shelves of junk in which the child no longer has any interest can go a long way in creating a harmonious environment.

Step 5. Get your child's attention

As an adult, you need to make sure the child is listening to you before making any requests, directions, or commands. If it's not on the same wavelength as you, you get nothing. After he starts doing a task, don't distract him with other commands or speech that can distract his attention.

• Make sure your child is watching you and make eye contact. While this isn't irrefutable proof of their attention, they are more likely to get your message by doing so.
• Reproaches dictated by anger, frustration or negative moods are usually "filtered". Often this is a defense mechanism… Children with ADHD tend to irritate people and fear being judged for something they cannot control. The screams, for example, do not attract the child's attention.
• Children with ADHD respond well to funny, unexpected, and outlandish things. Throwing a ball often is helpful in getting their attention, especially if you repeatedly exchange it before you make a request. Saying "Knock, Knock" and making a joke might work. Even a back-and-forth pattern or clapping could produce the desired reaction. These are all fun ways to "dispel the fog".
• It is difficult for children with ADHD to achieve concentration, so when they seem focused, give them the opportunity to stay focused by not interrupting them and not distracting them from the task they are doing.

Step 6. Get your child involved in various sports

Physical activity is one of the easiest and most effective ways to reduce the symptoms of the disorder, because it stimulates attention and concentration.

• Children with ADHD should play sports at least 3-4 times a week. The ideal alternatives are martial arts, swimming, dance, gymnastics and other activities that require the movement of various parts of the body.
• You can involve him in physical activity even during the days when he does not play sports, making him go on a swing or bike, taking him to the park, etc.

Method 2 of 4: Assume a Positive Attitude

Step 1. Give your child positive feedback

You could start with tangible rewards (stickers, popsicles, toys) for each milestone you reach. Over time you can gradually move on to occasional praise (“Great job!” Or a hug), but continue to provide positive feedback even when your child has developed healthy habits, which regularly generate good results.

Making your child feel proud of their accomplishments is first and foremost a key strategy to avoid resorting to punishment

Step 2. Act rationally

Use a calm tone of voice when you have to scold him. In a firm but detached tone of voice, say the fewest words when giving orders. The more you tell him, the less he will remember it.

• An expert reminds parents: "Take action, don't get lost in small talk!". Lecturing a child with ADHD is useless, while marked consequences are more eloquent.
• Avoid getting emotionally involved when you react to your child's behavior. If you get angry or scream it could increase his anxiety and fuel his belief that he's a bad boy who never gets it right. Also, you may be tricked into thinking that you are in control of the situation, as it can make you lose your temper.

Step 3. Address his behavioral manifestations directly

Children with ADHD need more rules than their peers. While you may be tempted to turn a blind eye to his behavior, it may actually increase the chances of him continuing to engage in it.

• As with most of life's problems, if you ignore them, they escalate and get worse. Therefore, it would be preferable to address the problematic behavior from the first time it occurs - and in a timely manner. Punish your child immediately, so that he can link his gesture to the punishment and your reaction. In doing so, over time he will learn that his behavior has consequences and will eventually change his attitude.
• Children with ADHD are impulsive and often do not evaluate the consequences of their actions. They fail to understand that they have done something wrong and, if the consequences are not implemented, the problem could get worse. Therefore they need adults to help them see and understand the inadequacy of their behavior and the potential consequences that derive from it.
• Understand that children with ADHD just need more patience, guidance, and practice. If you compare a child with ADHD to a "normal" child you will probably feel extremely frustrated. You will need to invest more time, energy and ideas to manage this kind of child. Stop comparing him to other “less problematic” children: this is essential to obtain more positive and therefore more constructive interactions and results.

Step 4. Offer positive reinforcement

Parents are successful with their children with ADHD by rewarding their positive behavior more often than punishing their negative behavior. Try to praise positive actions instead of criticizing mistakes.

• Many parents have been able to correct bad behaviors, such as lack of table education, by focusing on positive reinforcement and praise when their children are doing well. Instead of criticizing how your child sits at the table or eats, try to praise him when he uses his cutlery well and when he listens to you. This will help him be more careful about what he does to get your attention.
• Pay attention to the proportions. Make sure your child gets more positive than negative inputs. Sometimes you may have to go to great lengths to "find his good deeds," but the rewards you derive from praise, rather than punishment, will be incalculable.

Step 5. Develop a positive reinforcement system

There are many methods to get him to behave better: often the carrot works better than the threat of the stick. For example, if your child can get dressed and be ready for breakfast for a certain time, they can choose to eat waffles rather than cereal. Offering him the opportunity to choose is a positive reinforcement system to reward his correct behaviors.

• Establish a system for rewarding positive behavior that allows your child to earn some privileges, such as a coupon for a special permit, a day out, or something similar. Similarly, misconduct should result in the loss of points, which can be earned again by doing extra housework or similar activities.
• Applying a points system can help give your child the motivation they need to obey. If he refuses to pick up toys before bed, knowing that he will earn points for enjoying a privilege could be an incentive to follow the rules. The best part of such a system is that parents no longer play the bad part when children do not get privileges, because the chance of earning or losing points is up to them and therefore they have to take responsibility for their own choices.
• Remember that children achieve greater results with the points system when they are clearly specified the to-do list, the schedule and the related deadlines.

• Be aware that to-do lists and schedules have limitations. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder prevents even the most motivated children from concentrating. If expectations are too high or inadequate, the child may fail and the system may prove ineffective.

  • For example: a child who fails to play a school essay and takes so long that he misses the violin lesson, could have great difficulty.
  • Another example: a child is unable to assume the required behaviors and never gets enough gold stars to earn a prize. Without receiving positive reinforcement, he behaves badly instead of "accepting" the system.

  

  Step 6. Try to rephrase everything in positive rather than negative terms

  Instead of telling your child not to behave in a certain way, tell him what he should do. Often children with ADHD cannot immediately think of a positive behavior to replace the negative one, so it is difficult for them to reduce the frequency with which the same behavior will be emitted in the future. Your job, as a guide, is to remind him of the correct behavior. Furthermore, he may not perceive your "no" within the sentence, so his mind may not be able to correctly process what you say. For instance:

  • Instead of saying, "Stop jumping on the couch," tell him, "On the couch you're sitting."
  • "Use delicacy with the cat" instead of "Stop pulling the cat's tail".
  • "Sit cross-legged!" instead of "Stop getting up".
  • Focusing on affirmative sentences also works well for family rules. Instead of saying: "You don't play ball at home", try "The ball is used outside". You may be more successful by saying, "Walk slowly in the living room" rather than "No running!".

  

  Step 7. Avoid over-emphasizing negative behaviors

  Attention, good or bad, is a reward for children with ADHD. Therefore, you should offer your child your attention when they behave well, but limit them when they behave badly, as they could be interpreted as a reward.

  • For example, if your child gets out of bed at night to play, put him back to sleep in silence without hugging him and without giving too much importance to what happened. Don't hesitate to steal his toys from him, but don't talk about them right now, otherwise he'll feel gratified by your attention or think the rules can be challenged. If you stop gratifying negative behavior, it should disappear over time.
  • If your child is cutting the coloring book, simply put away the scissors and the book. It is enough to affirm in a calm tone: “The sheets are cut, not the books”.

  Method 3 of 4: Establish Consequences and Consistency

  

  Step 1. Take control of the situation:

  you are the adult. The parent must be in control, but too often the child's insistence cancels the will of the parents.

  • Consider a little girl who asks for a Coke five or six times within three minutes, while the parent is on the phone, taking care of the other child or trying to make dinner. Sometimes it is tempting, and it is easier, to give in: “Well, take it, but leave me alone!”. However, in this way you transmit the message that with insistence you can get what you want and what you command, rather than your dad or mom.
  • For children with ADHD, permissive education is not very effective. They need loving guidance and precise boundaries. Long discussions about the rules and why they must be followed don't work. Some parents are initially not comfortable with this approach. However, imposing precise, consistent and loving rules is not synonymous with harshness or cruelty.

  

  Step 2. Make sure you establish consequences for misbehavior

  The main rule is that the punishment must be consistent, immediate and incisive. Any punishment should be commensurate with the behavior assumed.

  • Don't send your child to his room as punishment. Most children with ADHD are easily distracted from their games and personal items and have so much fun that the punishment ends up being a reward. It is also removed and not linked to the mistake made, therefore it is difficult to relate the behavior with the punishment in order to learn not to repeat the same pattern of behavior.
  • The consequences should also be immediate. For example, if you tell a child to leave his bike and go home, but keep pedaling, don't tell him that you will stop him from riding the next day. The postponed consequences have no meaning for a child with ADHD, as they tend to live in the "here and now" and what happened yesterday does not matter today. It follows that this approach would result in a tantrum the next day, when the punishment is applied while the child does not actually make any connections. Instead, grab the bike immediately and explain that you will talk about getting it back later.

  

  Step 3. Be consistent

  Parents get more positive results if they are consistent. For example, if you use the points system, be reasonable and consistent with the assignment and removal of points. Avoid harassment, particularly when you are disappointed or angry. Your child will learn how to behave properly with the passage of time and with gradual learning and reinforcement.

  • Always stick to your promises and threats. Don't give him too many unnecessary warnings or threats. If you give him more than one chance or warnings, anticipate different levels of consequences for each recall and be sure to give the set punishments. Otherwise he will test you to see how many chances he will be given on each occasion.
  • Make sure that the other parent also adopts the same educational interventions as you. To change his behavior, your child needs consistent responses from both parents.
  • Consistency also means letting the child know what they will be facing if they misbehave, no matter where you are. Parents sometimes hesitate to punish their children in public because they fear the judgment of other people, but it is important to show that a certain negative behavior has consequences, in any context.
  • Be sure to coordinate with the teachers of the school, kindergarten or catechism school to be sure that they too apply consistent, immediate and incisive consequences, in order to prevent your child from receiving contradictory messages.

  

  Step 4. Avoid involving him in discussions

  Try not to be controversial and not to be inconclusive in your course of action. Your child needs to know that you are in charge.

  • The moment you quarrel or hesitate, he perceives the message that you are treating him as an equal who might win, so you give him reason to keep fighting and defeating you.
  • Always give specific instructions and make it clear that they must be followed.

  

  Step 5. Establish a time-out system

  This method can give your child a chance to calm down on their own. Instead of going head-to-head and seeing who can get angry the most, choose a place where they can sit or stay until they have calmed down and feel ready to deal with the problem. In the meantime, don't lecture him, but give him the time and space to regain control of the situation. Emphasize that the time-out is not a punishment, but an opportunity to start over.

  Time-out is an effective punishment for a child with ADHD. It can be applied immediately to help him understand the connection with his actions. Children with ADHD hate being still and quiet, so it is an effective way to correct negative behavior

  

  Step 6. Learn to anticipate problems and plan ahead

  Explain your concerns to your child and find a solution to any problems together. This is especially useful for handling your child in public. Work out together the rewards and consequences to apply to the situation and then have your child repeat the program aloud.

  If your family has to go out for dinner, for example, the reward for good behavior could be the privilege of ordering dessert, while the consequence could be going straight to bed when you get home. If his behavior begins to degenerate during dinner, a refresher ("What do you get as a reward if you behave well tonight?"), Followed, if necessary, by a second more severe intervention ("You want to go to bed soon tonight?”) should put your child back on track

  

  Step 7. Forget quickly

  Always remind your child that you love him, regardless of everything, and that he is a good child, but that his actions have consequences.

  Method 4 of 4: Understanding and Coping with ADHD

  

  Step 1. Find out how children with ADHD are different

  They can be provocative, aggressive, reluctant to accept the rules, overly emotional, passionate and uninhibited. Although for many years doctors have believed that the behavioral manifestations of these children are determined by the lack of parental control, in the early 20th century, researchers began to understand that the underlying cause of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is a brain dysfunction.

  • Scientists studying the brain structure of children with ADHD have found that parts of their brains are significantly less extensive than normal. Among these are the two basal ganglia which are involved in the programming of movement, initiating different motor programs. When the basal ganglia are in a resting condition, they hold back the motor centers of the brain, inhibiting any movement. For most of us, our hands and feet do not need to move when seated, but the less extensive basal ganglia in a child with ADHD cannot block movement, thus preventing them from sitting quietly.
  • In other words, in children with ADHD stimulation inside the brain is lacking and they have poor impulse control, so they have to work harder or "behave badly" to receive the necessary stimulation.
  • Once parents realize that their child is not simply stubborn or reckless and that their brain processes information differently due to the disorder, they can often manage their behavior more easily. Thanks to this understanding, they are able to deal with the situation with greater patience and willpower.

  

  Step 2. Understand the other reasons why a child with ADHD misbehaves

  Parents of children with ADHD are often faced with other problems associated with ADHD.

  • For example, about 20% of those with ADHD suffer from bipolar or depressive disorder, while another 33% suffer from behavioral disorders such as conduct disorder or oppositional defiant disorder. Many of them also manifest learning disabilities or problems related to anxiety.
  • Having other disorders or problems besides ADHD could make the task of educating your child even more difficult. This is especially the case when there are multiple drugs with various side effects to consider for symptom management.

  

  Step 3. Try not to get frustrated because your child doesn't behave "normally"

  There is no standard to define normality, and the very concept of "normal behavior" is relative and subjective. ADHD represents a disability and your child needs extra help and different educational strategies. This does not exclude that in case of visual impairment he will need lenses or in case of hearing problems he will need hearing aids.

  Your child's ADHD is his version of "normal". It is a disorder that can be managed effectively and your child can lead a happy and healthy life

  What You Can Realistically Expect

  • If you try some of these strategies you should notice improvements in your child's behavior, such as fewer tantrums and carrying out small tasks.
  • Remember that these strategies do not eliminate the main characteristics of the disorder, such as lack of attention or hyperactivity.
  • You may need to do a series of tests to figure out which educational strategies work best for your child. For example, some children respond well to timeouts, while others do not.