If you are forced to change plans, it is up to you to call and cancel. The way you cancel an appointment with a friend can make you appear untrustworthy, or like someone who still deserves trust in the future.
Steps
Part 1 of 2: Canceling Programs with a Friend
Step 1. Cancel your commitment immediately as soon as you have made the decision not to participate
To create as little annoyance as possible for your friend, give him more time to organize himself in another way. He would be much more resentful if you had to cancel at the last minute, after he has already changed his day to meet your needs.
Step 2. Use the phone rather than texting or emailing
It is very important to get in touch with your friend directly, so as not to waste time. If he doesn't answer you, leave him a message on the answering machine and only in that case send an SMS or an e-mail for clarification.
Step 3. Don't make excuses
Friends often notice when we are not being honest, so always try to tell the truth, so as to avoid the negative effects of little lies.
In some cases it may be better to tell a white lie, for example if you have bladder problems or if you know that your friend's ex-girlfriend will be present at the event you are attending. Only resort to lies when it is really needed. In most cases, you will be able to tell the truth later and your friend will understand
Step 4. Apologize for your defection
Be honest and acknowledge the fact that your friend has set aside time for you and you are wasting it.
Don't apologize more than once or twice, unless you feel like he doesn't think you're sorry
Step 5. Reimburse your friend for all costs due to your absence
If he finds himself with an extra ticket to an event, try to find a buyer.
Step 6. Postpone the appointment to another occasion
This way your friend will not think you are avoiding him and you are free to choose a date that is compatible with the commitments of both of you.
Part 2 of 2: Postponing the Appointment
Step 1. Do not postpone the appointment if there is a possibility that you will not be available even in the future
Relationships between two people can get a lot worse when one of the two parties continues to unsubscribe. Try to cancel commitments made only in very rare cases.
Step 2. Avoid making too many commitments
Suggest some dates when you will certainly be free.
Step 3. Suggest activities yourself, instead of letting the other person find an opportunity to meet
Step 4. When scheduling a meeting in the future, prioritize the other person's needs
For example, if you decide to cancel your lunch plans, you could invite your friend to his favorite restaurant over the next few days or cook for him yourself.
Step 5. Forgive your friend if he doesn't have a chance to postpone the engagement
If he seems grumpy to you, he's probably annoyed that you canceled. It can take time and several successful appointments to regain his trust.
