The correct use of who and whom in questions and statements can seem like a losing battle, fought only by those fussy English teachers. However, using these pronouns well is still important in formal contexts, especially when writing. After reading this article, you will feel more confident in the distinction between who and whom. When you express yourself in English, you will therefore seem more prepared and your language skills will stand out.
Steps
Method 1 of 1: Using Who and Whom Correctly
Step 1. Understand the difference between who and whom
First, both are relative pronouns. However, who is used as the subject of a sentence or proposition to indicate who is doing a certain action (such as he or she). Instead, whom is used as the direct or indirect object of a verb or preposition.
While prepositions (at, by, for, in, with, and so on) often precede whom, this doesn't always happen. So, the key question to ask is: Who is doing what to whom?, or "Who is doing what to whom?". In the following steps, you will discover a quick way to decide which pronoun to use in a particular question
Step 2. Use whom when referring to the subject of a verb or preposition
- To whom it may concern.
- To whom did you talk today? ("Who did you talk to today?").
- Whom does Sarah love? ("Who loves Sarah?").
Step 3. Use who when referring to the subject of a sentence or proposition
- Who brought the paper inside? ("Who brought the card in?").
- Who talked to you today? ("Who spoke to you today?").
- Who went to dinner? ("Who went to dinner?").
- Who ate the cake? ("Who ate the cake?").
- Our job is to determine who qualifies.
Step 4. Ask yourself if the answer to the question would be he or him
If you can answer the question with him, then use whom. You can easily remember this because both pronouns end in m. If you can answer the question with he, then use who.
- Example. The correct answer to the question To [ who or whom] did the prize go? ("Who did the prize go to?") Is It went to him. The correct pronoun for the question is whom.
- Example. The correct answer to the question [ Who or Whom] went to the store? ("Who went to the store?") Is He went to the store. The correct pronoun for the sentence is who.
Step 5.
When deciding whether to use who or whom, simplify the sentence.
If there are other words in a complex sentence that might mislead you, simplify it to include only the subject, verb, and object. This helps you parse the words in your mind to identify relationships between terms. Examples:
- Marie Antoinette and her ladies-in-waiting only invited people to their party [ who or whom] they considered to love parties as much as they did. In your mind, the simplified version becomes whom they considered.
- Marie Antoinette prevented her mother from knowing [ who or whom] she invited to the Petit Trianon ("Marie Antoinette did not let her mother know who she invited to the Petit Trianon"). In your mind, the simplified version becomes: who or whom she invited. At this point, you could rearrange it further: she invited whom; thus make it clear that Marie Antoinette made an action (invitation) addressed to someone.
The distinction between who and whom is less important in the informal spoken language than in the formal written one. It is possible that one day the distinction will disappear altogether. Nonetheless, it is important for now to keep a clear difference in the written language.
Advice
- Ask yourself: Who did what to whom?.
- Learning to distinguish between who and whom can also help you with grammar and understanding of other languages. Also, it is good to know the difference in order to be fluent in English and write correct sentences.
- It is possible to change the phrases in which you should enter who or whom to get around this, but the result will almost always be awkward. If you write To which person did the prize go? because you can't remember that for this question whom is the correct pronoun, you have avoided a grammatical error, but you have sacrificed the elegance of the writing.
- Here is a useful mnemonic trick to remember the difference between subject and object. If you say I love you, then you is the object of your love and the complement object of the sentence. I is the subject. Do you say Whom do I love? or Who do I love? ? Whom do I love?, because the answer, that is you, is the object complement.
- Learning another language besides English can be of great help to you. In most languages, there are clear distinctions between pronouns, so getting it wrong can cause some confusion. Examples are German and Spanish.
- The Canadian Council for the Advancement of Education (CCAE) suggests always using who to start a sentence.
- When who or whom appears in a sentence, the choice depends on the function of the pronoun within it: is it a subject or a complement? This applies regardless of the function of the proposition itself, so it does not matter whether in a complete sentence this proposition is independent or subordinate.
Warnings
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This topic generates a lot of confusion and errors among native speakers themselves. Just as using whom correctly can make others think you're cultured, misuse can make you seem presumptuous. Never use whom as a subject. Similarly, never use who where whom would go. Many will mistakenly believe that you are trying to be formal.
- Whom are you? it's wrong. You should write: Who are you?.
- John is the man whom I expect to be awarded the prize is wrong. You should write: John is the man who I expect to be awarded the prize.
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