Psychic vampires, also known as energy vampires, are emotionally immature individuals who drain time and energy from others. They usually have a highly selfish attitude, are poorly empathetic, and tend to establish relationships thinking only of themselves. To be able to face them and defend yourself you need to learn to recognize them, set clear boundaries and commit to developing your self-confidence and self-esteem.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Identifying a Psychic Vampire
Step 1. Learn about the different types of psychic vampires
There is a wide variety of them: the relationships that drain our energies can manifest themselves through multiple personalities. Begin to understand the different forms that energy vampires can take.
- Narcissistic psychic vampires: They are highly presumptuous and feel empowered to have any behavior. They tend to be low-empathic and become negative and grumpy if things aren't done their way. In fact, they are not adept at loving unconditionally.
- Psychic Victim Vampires: They tend to view the world through a filter called "poor me". They believe that by nature life is against them and blame it for their unhappiness. They drain the energy of others by constantly complaining about their own problems, and refuse to accept any suggestions about possible solutions.
- Authoritarian psychic vampires: They feel the need to control and manipulate the actions of others. They often demolish other people's emotions in an attempt to dominate or denigrate them.
- Talkative psychic vampires: They constantly slip into conversations with a willingness to share their thoughts and experiences without giving others a chance to have their say. Often they also tend to invade the physical boundaries, getting too close to the interlocutors.
- Melodramatic psychic vampires: they drain energy from people, exasperating even the most ordinary situations. Being late for an appointment is the end of the world and their way of describing things is always exaggerated, consequently every trifle always tends to turn into something sensational, both for good and for bad.
Step 2. Evaluate your interpersonal relationships
Scan them for a few minutes for possible psychic vampires. Ask yourself if in the company of some people you happen to feel deprived of your energy and if your relationships are beneficial for both components.
- Do you have the ability to fully understand the state of mind of others? Psychic vampires often choose the company of those who are highly empathetic by taking advantage of their remarkable patience. Has anyone ever accused you of being too nice? Do most of your relationships seem to be beneficial in one direction?
- If you think one of your relationships tends to deprive you of all your energy, ask yourself if both parties have a way to benefit from it. Psychic vampires thrive on friendships and one-way relationships. Think about the last time you were in a state of emotional stress. Has the person in question been willing to help you? Did she make an effort to listen to you or did she divert attention to herself?
Step 3. Tune in to your feelings
When you run into a psychic vampire, you are forced to face physical and emotional side effects. If you have any of the following symptoms, you may be in a relationship with an energy vampire:
- Tiredness and an increased need for sleep.
- Low morale.
- A desire to find fulfillment in food - especially carbohydrates.
- Feelings of anxiety, depression and negativity.
- You often feel downcast.
Part 2 of 3: Blocking the Psychic Vampires
Step 1. Set firm boundaries
The first thing to do in order to be able to defend yourself from an energy vampire is to establish marked boundaries. When he realizes that you have set limits, the psychic vampire will back off and go in search of another victim.
- Clearly define what you can and cannot do for the other person. Explain precisely what amount of time, space and energy is considered reasonable, and what is not. Try saying something like, "I'm really happy to talk to you about your problems, but when you refuse to listen to any possible solution or allow me to help you get better, I have to say enough."
- Try to set boundaries to your advantage, especially if you're dealing with a narcissistic vampire. Try to remember that it is not good to fall in love or to establish a strong bond of friendship with a person who is unable to give love.
- Body language is very useful. If a psychic vampire tries to cross your boundaries, cross your arms and look away by breaking eye contact. In doing so you will send a signal like: "Take a step back, this time I don't intend to accept it".
Step 2. Step back if you feel controlled
Psychic vampires thrive on controlling others. If you feel that your space and time are being managed by another person, loosen your relationship.
- If a psychic vampire is trying to control you or give you unsolicited advice, block them by openly stating that you don't need their help. For example, you can say, "I appreciate that you want to offer me your advice, but I need to handle this by myself."
- People often tend to assimilate the criticisms made by psychic vampires. As a result, they create an inner critic, as ruthless as the vampire. Make a commitment to silence the inner voice that defines you as unable to make your own decisions. When you find yourself having self-denigrating thoughts, pause and remind yourself, "This is negative and useless behavior."
Step 3. Stay away from psychic vampires
After a certain point, you may need to end your relationship, or at least loosen the bond. If a psychic vampire continues to violate your boundaries and demand too much in terms of time and emotional energy, you need to make an effort to distance yourself from them. Do not respond to his messages and calls and limit the time you spend with him.
Step 4. Do some deep breathing exercises
Dealing with a psychic vampire can be stressful and exhausting. Deep breathing techniques will help you relax and calm down, and can also give you new vigor.
- At any time of the day, place a hand on your abdomen and inhale. Inhale so that your hand rises as the diaphragm expands. Hold your breath for a count of 3, then exhale.
- Deep breathing can turn into a meditative practice. In addition to slowing down your thoughts, it provides the brain with the amount of oxygen it needs, helping you to restore the energy that has been drained from you by the psychic vampire.
Part 3 of 3: Working on Yourself
Step 1. Consult a psychologist
Many of the people who find themselves in a relationship with a psychic vampire have low self-esteem. Talking to a qualified psychologist can help you overcome any disturbances related to emotions, feelings, and interactions with others. You can choose a therapist with the help of your GP, or ask friends, relatives or educational institutions for advice if you are a student.
Step 2. Know yourself better
Often the reason we expose ourselves to attack by psychic vampires is that we don't have a deep knowledge of ourselves. Spending some time reflecting on your real needs and wants will help keep them away.
- Keeping a journal is a great way to get to know yourself better. Write down your thoughts and feelings every day. Choose a quiet time of day, like waking up or just before going to sleep, to record your emotions.
- Spend time alone. Make a conscious effort to be alone for a while. By being in the company of yourself for a couple of evenings a week you will be forced to take an interest in your needs and emotions.
- Consider if you tend to be too accommodating. Psychic vampires are highly attracted to those who struggle to say "no" in order not to disappoint other people. Try to let go of your tendency to be too condescending to reduce the energy vampire's grip.
Step 3. Increase your energy level with the right activities
By becoming very energetic and confident you will be able to ward off energy vampires. Focus on those activities that allow you to strengthen your self-esteem and vitality. For example, experiment with some of the following:
- Exercise regularly.
- Team play.
- Yoga.
- Pilates.
- Karate or another martial art.
- I swim.
- Kayak.
- Outdoor sports.
