It can be quite difficult to get away from a loved one. Whether it's ending a romance that doesn't work or moving to another place and leaving friends and family, it's not easy to just accept the situation and move on. However, there are several solutions that make a separation easier. In these cases, one must always take care of oneself emotionally.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Ending a Romantic Relationship
Step 1. Recognize your love bond
Maybe you need to end your relationship because you are moving away or you have come to the conclusion that you do not have the right person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. Whatever the reason, it can be quite difficult to separate yourself from the person you love.
- Realize that you can leave someone, but still love them. Therefore, you should recognize the strong bond you have with your partner.
- Honor the feeling you have, but you should also understand that love isn't always enough to carry on a relationship.
- You probably have to part with the person you love because you have an important job opportunity and you are forced to move to another place or because there is no compatibility between you. It is normal to continue to love someone and, at the same time, to feel the need to look to the future.
Step 2. Treat the other person with respect
If you are the one who ends the relationship, know that it will not be an easy path. However, don't forget that your partner will have their difficulties too. So, try to treat him with respect and kindness.
- Avoid making accusations. Try to explain why you have to split up, but don't say, "It's your fault I leave you."
- Listen to the other person when they tell you about their state of mind. If you love her, you should respect her enough to consider her point of view.
- Give yourself time to recover and give it to your partner too. Chances are you will need time to grieve and process the end of your story.
Step 3. Consider establishing a friendship
Just because your relationship isn't going to move on doesn't mean you have to completely cut the other person out of your life. It is possible that over time you will become friends. If you wish, talk to her about it.
- Ask for an honest opinion. Try saying, "I know the relationship between us will never be the same, but I would like us to remain friends."
- Don't expect an immediate switch. Give yourself time to get used to the new situation.
- Avoid looking for the other person for a month or two. Then gradually resume contact.
Step 4. Organize yourself to cope with loneliness
If you used to live in a relationship, being alone can be a big challenge. Take the time you need to think about how you can manage yourself. Consider your emotional needs and your new situation.
- You may be afraid of getting anxious once you leave your partner. Ask a close friend if they can be available when you need someone to talk to.
- If you are concerned that you will be missing out on practical things, like having someone make you coffee in the morning, think about how you can manage. For example, you might start grabbing for coffee at the coffee shop before you go to work.
- List any changes you need to adjust to. Then make a list of all the possible solutions you can find.
Step 5. Find a support group
A separation in love can be a very difficult process on an emotional level. If you're having a hard time coping with depression, anxiety, or abandonment, you probably need help. Consider joining a support group.
- You may find relief by talking to people who are in the same situation as you. Look for a group near you.
- If your husband has to go on a military operation that will last a long time, consider finding a group that specializes in offering support during the most difficult and painful periods of transition.
- Ask your doctor for advice. A series of support groups often gravitate around health facilities.
Step 6. Focus on the positives
You probably won't be able to see them at first, but there is always a silver lining in the most difficult situations. Try to reflect on the way your life is changing. Write down all the aspects that are changing for the better.
- While it is difficult to end a romantic relationship, there are some positive aspects. For example, being alone can foster personal growth.
- You will likely feel a growing sense of independence and freedom. Take the opportunity to think about your needs and desires.
- For example, if you feel like eating popcorn for dinner and watching reality TV, you can do it without being accountable to anyone.
Part 2 of 3: Get away from family and friends
Step 1. Spend special moments with those you love
Moving to another city is one of the main reasons for separating from loved ones. If you are forced to split up from friends or family, the situation can be really difficult. Try spending more time with them before you leave.
- Put your relationships first. Plan to have a good time with your friends before you leave.
- Have fun with them. It is very likely that you will feel sad, but it is normal. Try to propose something pleasant and interesting to do together.
- If you've always enjoyed going dancing with your best friend, don't hesitate. Keep doing this until the moment you leave.
- Speak honestly with the person you love. Tell her you'll have to leave.
- Try saying, "Mom, I will miss you immensely when I have to leave for college. I just wanted to let you know."
Step 2. Stay in touch
Tell your loved ones that you intend to keep in touch with them. Think about how you can do it. Also try writing a few letters.
- Sign up for a rate plan that allows you to phone friends and family. This way, you can send text messages and call as long as you want without time limits.
- Schedule some video calls. Worried about missing out on some impromptu party with your best friend? Just use FaceTime or Skype to connect at the best moments, such as when your favorite songs are playing.
- Use technology. Connect on social networks. This is the perfect time to finally get your grandmother to open a Facebook account.
Step 3. Make a decision to visit your loved ones
You may be terrified of separating from important people, especially if you don't know when you will be able to see them again. To avoid this distressing feeling, plan your visits before you leave.
- Sit down with the people you love and set a date for the next meeting. If you need to say goodbye to a group of friends, invite them all to a party and decide when to see each other again.
- Pick a couple of dates that work for everyone. It can be fun to decide when you will visit them and when they will visit you in your new home.
- If you are leaving for university, check the academic calendar. Let your parents know when you have finished an exam session and more time to review them.
Step 4. Send some thoughts
It's a great way to feel connected to your loved ones. Come up with a way to send a thought one month and get another from them the next month. This way, you will have something to look forward to.
- Try sending items that remind you of funny moments spent together. For example, if you enjoyed practicing yoga with your friend, send them a discount coupon from your favorite gym.
- You can also put something homemade in the package. Make your dad's favorite cookies and send them to him.
- Use your creativity. If you are thinking about the beautiful days spent on the beach, put a handful of sand in a plastic bag and send it in the mail.
Part 3 of 3: Starting Over
Step 1. Get involved
It is difficult to leave an important person in one's life. However, don't forget that this experience has its positives. You will certainly have more free time, so take advantage of it.
- Find something new to do. You could join a book club in the city where you went to live.
- Come up with a way to commit to something. Consider volunteering at an animal shelter if you love them.
- By taking part in activities you have never tried, you will be able to meet new people. They won't replace the ones you miss, but they can definitely make you feel less alone.
Step 2. Don't hesitate to explore
If you have moved to a new city, go out and look around. Pretend you are a tourist. Visit all the most interesting places, such as museums and parks.
- Go in search of anything you might like. What better reason to try all the pizzerias in the neighborhood where you live?
- As you explore your new city, you will feel more at home. The more you get to know it, the more comfortable you will feel.
- You can explore where you live even if you have not changed cities. Test yourself by venturing to a bar you've never attended or by joining another gym. You may be making new friends.
Step 3. Be patient
Give yourself the time you need to adjust to the new reality. It will take some time to get used to the absence of friends and family. Don't be too hard on yourself, but keep in mind that this is all part of the path you have taken.
Don't expect to adapt to the new environment and new habits too quickly. Take some time to reflect on the positive changes that may be happening in your life
Step 4. Recognize what you are feeling
Even once you have settled in, you will likely go through days of missing your loved ones. It's normal. Take note of your state of mind and give yourself time to process your feelings.
- When you feel lonely, contact your friends. It is the ideal time. A few minutes of laughter on the phone can cheer you up.
- Be active. Take a walk when you are out of sorts. Exercise and the outdoors can lift the spirits.
Advice
- Focus on the most important connections in your life. Be with the people you love.
- Use this experience as an opportunity to meet new people and try different things.
