Did you misbehave with her? Did you say something terrible to her? Do you want to apologize honestly and directly? Or do you prefer a more elaborate technique? Do you want to win her back? If you really love this girl and can't imagine life without her, here is an article that will tell you how to get her forgiveness.
Steps
Method 1 of 2: Part 1: Apologize to Voice
Step 1. Think about how to apologize and get to the bottom of the problem
Everyone can say "I'm sorry", but not everyone really hears it and can solve the problem. Be careful - your girlfriend will expect you to think about your actions for a long time before apologizing to her. Make sure you have convincing answers regarding:
- Because you did what you did, or said what you said.
- What is the aspect of your personality that prompted you to act like that.
- What do you plan to do to avoid falling into the same mistake.
Step 2. Start with a simple and shy "I'm sorry
" Don't try to apologize without using the words "I'm sorry." Your girlfriend expects these exact words; so, be prepared to say it convincingly.
Step 3. If she invites you to leave, tell her you want to apologize
Tell her that you are going to find a solution and get your relationship back in the best possible way. Don't scream or speak without giving her her space; you could scare her, making things worse.
If she seems very sorry or angry, and doesn't want your apology right now, give her time. Ask her if you can call her in a couple of days
Step 4. Calmly explain the reasons for your attitude
If you have thought about the problem, you will surely have an idea of what you did wrong and how you can avoid it in the future.
- Example: "I know I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have lied to you and your family about my age. I know I did wrong, but I didn't want you, or them, to have no faith in me because I'm older.. I care a lot about you and your parents; in fact, I would like to apologize to them directly as well. If you are very angry I can understand it perfectly."
- Example: "I shouldn't have looked at Marta that way. I know she is your friend and I would never do anything to ruin our relationship or the friendship you have with her. I have no excuse for how I behaved; just an explanation: Lots of guys are used to setting their sights on girls. Now that I know it bothers you, I'll do everything I can not to make the same mistake."
- Example: "I'm sorry for calling you that - I'll never say it again. It was really insulting. I recognize that. I shouldn't have let it slip. I know you might change your mind about me after what you heard; so, I'll do everything to regain your trust."
Step 5. Give her time to respond
Let him ask you all the questions he wants, and answer them. Here are a couple of things to keep in mind:
- Don't put the blame on her. Even if you weren't the only one wrong, it's not a good idea to blame her. Your apology won't do any good if you do.
- Make her express all the anger, resentment, and disappointment she feels. After all, he has the right. It will make her feel so much better.
- Don't show affection right now - it's probably still too early. This includes: kissing, hugging or holding her hand.
Step 6. Tell her that you will give her time if she needs it
Repeat your apology briefly and leave her alone if she needs it. Respect their way of dealing with the problem.
Method 2 of 2: Part Two: Apologize with Other Techniques
Step 1. If after making your apology verbally, you still don't get results, try other techniques
In some cases you will have to apologize several times before he forgives you and realizes that you are sincere. This is fine; the more effort you put into apologizing, the greater the chance that she will truly forgive you.
Step 2. Write an apology letter
Add a romantic touch, like a bouquet of flowers. Or, deliver it yourself or have it delivered by a mutual friend. The letter might say:
Example: "I know that a letter will not be enough to resolve the situation. I also know that a letter will not be able to fully convey to you how I feel and what I have to say. What I know is that I was wrong. life without you. You are the person I dream of when I go to sleep and the person I think of when I wake up in the morning. You are everything to me. Nothing I can do now will make you feel better, but I swear I will not repeat it. same mistake. I promise you with all my heart."
Step 3. Depending on the girl, try to apologize publicly
Be careful, as some girls can't stand letting others know what's going on in their relationships. If you decide to apologize publicly, use common sense. Consider this too: Your girlfriend may think you apologize in public just to pressure her. If you think this is your case, forget it and keep things between you and her.
- If you think it's appropriate, apologize publicly at the right time. Ask for forgiveness when you are with friends; prepare something to say and open your heart to the maximum. Look her straight in the eye and focus your attention only on her.
- If you are feeling particularly creative, why not organize a "flash mob"? A "flash mob" needs a lot of preparation; so, make sure it works before embarking on this "adventure".
Step 4. Leave her flowers, chocolates or stuffed animals at home or in the workplace
Girls love these kinds of things. Also write her a short message; gifts like that not accompanied by a message deprive them of much of the emotion. Remember, what you want to arouse is emotion!
Step 5. Write an apology song and post it on YouTube
Clearly, any song that may have meaning to you can be fine. You could try using a song you already know and change a part of the lyrics to fit the situation.
Alternatively, prepare a mix of songs. It may seem a little more impersonal, but with a little creativity it will get the message across. Choose songs he already knows and some songs you know he has never heard
Step 6. Write her a poem
Record it on a CD and let him have it. Do it with your heart and put all the emotion you can into it. Get inspired by some famous poem and try to reproduce it in your own words.
Advice
- The basis for apologizing is to be honest and to really do it; otherwise, it's not worth it.
- Don't expect anything in return; just focus on the fact that you want to apologize.
- Persistence is the key to success; however, respect her if she asks you for time to think.
- Try to make the moment you apologize to something special; let her know that you care about her.
- It is not necessary to spend a lot of money to give her a gift; most girls value a sincere gesture much more. Let's take an example: pick some wild flowers in a meadow and have them find them in the office, prepare a surprise dinner for her, give her some cuddles etc …
- Asking her friends for help is always good (unless they are mad at you themselves).
- Whatever you do, prepare yourself well. Focus on your plan in detail. Of course, you don't want your intentions to be misunderstood.
- Remember: the sooner you do it, the better. If it really is a very serious mistake, try to patch it up as soon as possible. The more time you pass, the worse it will be.
- Don't press for any kind of response and don't give ultimatums. If she feels the pressure, it will make things worse.
Warnings
- There are no guarantees! However, remember that in the end you will just want her to understand how you feel.
- Ask yourself why you want to apologize and if you really feel sorry for what you did; these two points will determine the right tactic to use.
- Not in all cases an apology is necessary; especially if you believe that simply because your girlfriend is disappointed, or angry, you have a duty to ask her. Think carefully about how you behaved, but also how she behaved.
- Don't get caught up in a "vicious" circle of endless excuses for everything, just to get her to regain her composure. Doing so could set in motion a mechanism that will cause you to not stand each other.
- Don't put pressure on your girlfriend when she has to make a decision. Give her her space and don't communicate with her for a couple of days!
