Do you find yourself angry when you realize that your partner cannot naturally guess what your needs are? Communication requires commitment. This article will help you take the right direction.
Steps
Step 1. Train your intimate relationship
In today's dialogue, this expression quickly brings to mind sexual activity, although the words imply a deeper level of interaction. Being intimate with someone has a meaning beyond the physical. The goal of an intimate relationship is to see in the other person, trying to create a special space in one's mind dedicated to his words, his body language and his actions.
Step 2. Learn to pay attention to clues
Regarding some topics, your partner may not express their feelings directly, while the non-verbal clues may be many. Sometimes, body language can communicate more than words. Should a misunderstanding arise, it will be important to practice your willingness to communicate.
Step 3. Learn to specify what you mean
How many times have we joked about a game between husband and wife: the wife says "this", with the pretense that the husband understands that in reality he meant "that". Very often, when we say one thing we actually mean another. There are several funny and real jokes about it. Sometimes we expect our partner to understand the hidden meaning between our words, although relying on this kind of hope is not an effective strategy. On the contrary, learn to express your thoughts directly.
Step 4. Learn to say what you want in a way that your partner can truly understand
Be specific. For example, instead of offering alternatives to the plan of taking you to your boyfriend's party, tell him the truth: that you just don't want to meet all those people after a hard week at work. Also add: "I'm sorry, but I'm not in the mood for a party tonight." Speaking your thoughts directly eliminates resentment and confusion about your motives.
Step 5. Put yourself in your partner's shoes
Use the power of imagination to comprehensively picture the perspective of others in a given situation. Be aware that there may be factors you are not aware of.
Step 6. Encourage your partner to freely express the origins of their thoughts and feelings
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"I'm trying to understand you, but it's not easy for me. Did I do something that upset you?" "No." "Has anyone else done something that upset you?" "No." "Are you just in a bad mood?" "Yup." "Because of me?" "No. Not really." You are approaching the goal. It might seem like a very challenging process, but it will lead to results that will be worthwhile.
- Give your partner the freedom to work on their inner conflicts.
Step 7. Proactively address the problems and misunderstandings that arise between you
Both members of the relationship can propose solutions until they can find one that is acceptable to both parties. A real compromise occurs when both partners feel that their thoughts and emotions are taken into consideration, while respecting the real obstacles: feasibility, time, costs, etc.
Step 8. Relax
Find time to have fun and to take yourself a little less seriously. Do things together that both of you really like, including something unexpected. Dive into new experiences together and bring your sense of wonder back to the surface.
Step 9. Talk about topics the other person likes to hear
In a relationship, every communication builds bonds and trust, with the possibility of finding common interests. For this, avoid talking about unwelcome or uncomfortable topics for your partner.