Being scratchy means having guts, following your dreams and not giving weight to those who try to get in your way. It may seem easier said than done, but if you follow these steps, you'll be well on your way to being more assertive and cool in no time.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Part One: Having the Right Attitude
Step 1. Be adventurous
Strong people are always willing to try new things. You don't have to try your hand at skydiving if it's not for you, but you should be willing to accept invitations from people you've recently met, try a new cuisine you didn't even know existed or go on a last-minute car trip to climb. a beautiful mountain. Don't just do the same old stuff and make it a point to try something completely different at least once a week.
- Having a routine is great because it can help you organize your days as productively as possible, but you should always leave some space for that X factor, which will have you following a different path at least for a while.
- Make sure you get out of your comfort zone as often as possible. You will discover things you never thought you would like.
- While setting goals is important, it is also important to sit on top of a cliff every now and then. Make every experience worth it.
Step 2. Follow your dreams
It might seem like this has nothing to do with being purposeful, but finding your dreams and actually chasing them is closely related to this way of being. Being scratchy means seeing everything a little differently, doing what you like and accepting the fact that this may not fit into the general idea of what you should do in life. Pablo Picasso, Albert Eistein and Coco Chanel were all biting people in their own way, even if they only appeared eccentric or "different" at the time.
- Whatever your dreams are, be confident and comfortable following them. What do you care if others have to say that you want to become an actress or publish a detective novel while knowing that there is a good chance that you will not reach your goal? Follow your dreams, however impractical they may be, it will make you decisive.
- If you don't know what your dreams are, then it's a good time to find out. You can't really be determined if you feel purposeless or like you're going with the flow instead of your passion.
Step 3. Be slightly extreme when indulging in your passions
You don't necessarily have to rush out and say hello to your roommate as soon as he enters the house. Let yourself be absorbed. Let yourself be obsessed. It's okay to be so focused that you don't fully notice what's going on around you; the most important thing is that you commit yourself to being involved in what makes you happy to be alive.
You don't have to become an unsociable mad scientist to be a little extreme sometimes. Don't resist the urge to fully immerse yourself in whatever interests you, whether it's the watercolor painting you're almost done or the new oak bookcase you're determined to finish
Step 4. Stand up for yourself
Determined people do not bow their heads or run away. If someone criticizes you, gossip about you, or says something bad about you while you're around, don't flinch. You don't have to start arguing or insulting this person, but you should be proud enough to be yourself and to know that it's worth defending yourself. Don't let others think you can get away with trying to demoralize you.
If someone is making fun of your friends, brothers or sisters, family members or anyone else, then be sure to defend them too. Show your respect
Step 5. Be confident
You won't be very determined if you just doubt yourself or tell yourself that you should have done things differently. To be really scratchy and to be happy doing what you like and exposing yourself, you need to be a confident person. As much as self-esteem comes from within, you can make a concentrated effort to love what you know and the things you do and to be satisfied with yourself inside and out.
- If you are unsure of yourself, people will not take your original ideas or projects seriously.
- Pretend you are confident until you really are. Paying more attention to your personal hygiene, dressing a little better, and walking tall can also boost your self-esteem.
Step 6. Don't delay
Decisive people have places to go and people to see. They aren't sitting on the couch for hours eating yesterday's stale popcorn and watching the latest “Law and Order: SVU” marathon, however captivating the story of Detectives Benson and Stabler is. Get up off the couch and start changing one piece of the world, one book, one tree or one soup kitchen at a time. Don't waste time suffering from a hangover, stalking your ex on Facebook, or sitting down and texting your 10 closest acquaintances because you can't think of anything interesting to do.
Biting people never get bored because they always have something in store, whether it's chasing their latest project, going to the opening of a new gallery or keeping fit
Step 7. Be eccentric
Don't just be so in order to get some attention, if you're naturally a little eccentric or known for original thinking, go for it. Don't hide your inner quirks, be proud of the things that make you unique. Maybe you like to wear a red silk robe to go to sleep, maybe you like to make collages dedicated to the destinations you would like to visit. Whatever you do that strays at least a little from everyone's beaten path, pick it up and cultivate it.
Remember that there is a certain difference between being eccentric and just being weird. You don't have to shock people or make them feel confused or uncomfortable in order to be extravagant
Step 8. Update yourself
If you want to be scratchy, then you need to be in the know. This means you should know who the winner of the latest Sundance Film Festival is, go to the new Burmese restaurant that everyone is raving about, and modernize your haircut and fashion more often than every five years. It also means that you should really follow the news, read the newspapers and be able to have an intelligent conversation about what's going on in the world.
Keeping yourself up to date doesn't mean you have to copy every trend you see. There is a big difference between being aware of trends and following them obsessively
Method 2 of 3: Part Two: Have the Right Look
Step 1. Dress in a unique way
Opting for this style choice means not looking like any other person. Being biting means dressing in a unique way, as well as conveying a carefree message. In your closet you can't miss the leather garments, the Converse and the boots. Use bright and bold colors in your style. You can be inspired by the new line of Madonna "Material Girl" or by everything you find in thrift stores or outlets like Urban Outfitters.
- Girls can wear leather jackets, mini skirts with leggings, combat boots, t-shirts depicting the bands they prefer and opt for the styles that best suit them.
- Guys can wear tight shirts, leather jackets, printed shirts and anything that makes them feel good.
Step 2. Put on some special accessories
A few key accessories can add an extra touch to your quirky style. Girls can wear long chains (gold or silver), bangles or heavy bracelets. Both boys and girls can wear the original black Converse or the lime green, purple or blue versions. If you want the laces of one shoe to be blue and those of the other green, you can opt for this alternative. Add lace, skulls and things like that. You should be unique, but still have style.
Guys can bring shoulder bags or an extravagant belt to spice up their look
Step 3. Choose a bold hairstyle
Girls can get a pixie cut and boys gel hair or shave. There is no proper hairstyle for this way of being, although cutting your hair differently every couple of years is a good rule to follow. Fashions change, and your hair should too. Take some time to apply the gel and tidy them up, but don't spend hours and hours on it. You will have more important things to do if you are truly a biting person.
Girls can be inspired by Taylor Momsen's style. Her new look is considered “edgy”, that is, scratchy. The way she dresses should give you an idea of what it's like to adopt this look
Step 4. Find your style
Although the style blogs, celebrity photos, television, magazines and all the other sources you use to get oriented are great, the inspiration, after all, you will still have to find it in yourself to dress in a way that allows you. to express yourself with uniqueness. Find a way to combine what you love by completely representing yourself, no one else.
Don't feel obligated to stick to one style - you can be goth one day and girly the next if that's what you want
Step 5. Don't get a tattoo unless you think it's the right one for you
Tattoos are excellent for expressing your individuality and for making something truly original and eye-catching. That said, getting yourself a tattoo will NOT automatically make you scratchy. In fact, if you have no other such qualities, then a tattoo will make you look even less assertive. Before you get one, look at hundreds to get an idea of what you really want and make sure you wait at least a couple of months between deciding to get one and going straight to the tattoo artist so you don't make an impulsive decision.
While covering entire forearms with tattoos, you won't be able to demonstrate your scratchy look without having the aptitude for it
Method 3 of 3: Part Three: Having the Right Social Posture
Step 1. Don't care what other people think of you
Who really cares about the opinions of the "popular" mass? If they laugh at you, smile and walk away. They only do it because they are looking for a reaction! Don't put on airs or act like you're better than anyone else. Be nice to your friends and schoolmates. Show that you are strong, but courteous.
- Don't waste time trying to please people you don't really care about.
- Don't mirror yourself in public, or it will seem that you care too much about what people think.
- While not worrying about what others think seems impossible, you can do it if you intend to let the opinions of others slip over you, little by little.
Step 2. Don't be a script
Admiring your friend's new jacket is a far cry from buying one exactly the same and wearing it the next day. Think about what you like and try to avoid imitating the way people talk, dress or approach the world. It's good to hang out with people you admire and get inspired by them in certain things, which you will then include in your way of being. The same goes for celebrities.
Don't be afraid to compliment others. Just make sure it doesn't look like flattery
Step 3. Praise other people, but only when you really mean it
If you want to be biting, you can still tell others how much you appreciate their look, their art, their latest story, the idea of participating in the war in Syria, in short, whatever you like. Letting people know when you like something is a sign of respect and should become a habit. Flattering people, licking their feet and complimenting them just because you think it will get you something or because that's what they want to hear is the opposite of being edgy.
You should also know how to take a compliment. Thank people but don't go overboard with gratitude every time someone tells you you have nice shoes
Step 4. Avoid doing the same things over and over with your friends
If you want to be scratchy, then going bowling on a Friday night is no longer for you. It's okay to do silly things or follow some of your favorite exit routines, but if you want to be "edgy" then you have to delve into unexplored territory. Go see an experimental work. Check out the new co-op on the other side of town. Make jewelry out of bottle caps in a refurbished warehouse. Find something new that you are passionate about and that helps you grow as a person.
If your friends refuse to do something new with you, you don't have to give them up. But you should find other friends to try new experiences with
Step 5. Associate with people who can challenge you
If you run alongside someone faster than you, you will run faster. If you run alongside someone slower than you, your body will naturally decelerate. The same goes for this way of being. If you know someone who is very determined, whom you respect and deeply admire, and who you want to emulate, then keep dating this person.
- If you know a group of people who like to stay up late talking about Marxism, the eco-friendly lifestyle, or whatever interests you, make it a habit to spend more time with them.
- You don't have to consider them your "edgy" friends. Think of them simply as people who encourage you to develop this side of your way of being.
Step 6. Make strong eye contact with people
This is an important part of your social game. Decisive people aren't afraid to talk to strangers, and they're not afraid of people they already know either. So when you meet someone, make eye contact instead of staring at the ground or looking distracted. Show that you are not afraid to make a connection and that you are ready for a new challenge.
Looking people in the eye suggests that you are confident and ready to get to know them better
Step 7. Don't be afraid to smile at least a little
You may think that, to appear firm, you have to be dark, mysterious, and not particularly approachable, but an occasional smile can make a big difference in your social game. If you don't want to have a 32-tooth smile and look silly, that's fine, but try to genuinely smile at people every now and then. This applies to strangers and those you know well. Don't worry or think that this makes you seem weak or frivolous.
Step 8. Stay up late talking about topics that fascinate you
Find the right people for you. Once you spot them, don't miss the opportunity to discuss your great ideas with them. This does not mean gossiping or analyzing in detail the latest episode of “Desperate Housewives”, but talking about the relationships, ideas and ideologies that make the world go round. Maybe bring a bottle of whiskey.
