You were once a happy couple, then things changed and you broke up. But now your ex has started going to the same places that you frequent, he shows up in front of work, your school, in front of your house or sits at the table next to yours in the restaurant trying to spy on you. The ex continues to send you gifts, tickets, emails and messages, begging you to come back with you. And it doesn't just do it once, it does it almost every day, in other words, it has started to haunt you. This obsessive behavior worries you and you would like to find a remedy. How to do?
Steps
Step 1. Ignore your ex and everything he does
Pay no attention, absolutely not blink. Nothing at all. Not even a smile or a word, even if it happens suddenly and by mistake. Smiling or showing a friendly attitude will only encourage his persecution delusions because it will only confirm his hope of still having you around.
Step 2. Get back all the keys to your apartment
If in doubt, change all the locks in the house.
Step 3. Change your mobile number
At the office, ask if you can have a different internal number. If a colleague of yours should answer his calls (for example a secretary) try to inform you.
Step 4. Talk to people you trust
The sooner you do it the better. Confide in someone and tell them what is happening, also ask them if they can point you to a safe place to stay.
Step 5. Change your daily routine
Wake up at different times, take another route to go to work and change the places where you usually go for coffee or lunch.
Step 6. Keep track of everything
Record what happened, where and when. Write down every phone call (also consider the rings) and every time you have spoken or discussed.
Step 7. Report the incident to the police
Even if you are sorry, you need to talk to the police and let them know what is happening. Stalking is a crime punishable by law. Bring evidence that illustrates your ex's behavior to agents.
Step 8. Go your own way, try to live as best you can
It's certainly not easy to feel spied 24/7, but your ex needs to understand that you've moved on and you no longer have any interest in him. Communicate this message through your actions.
Advice
- Get a boxing bag and use it to let off steam.
- If you can't sleep at night, talk to your doctor. Don't worry, you are not the first person to have such a thing happening to.
- Don't be afraid to consult a lawyer or call the police if the situation is getting out of hand.
Warnings
- Do not get back with your ex. Your problems will increase.
- Don't become the stalker of a stalker. Spend your time constructively and avoid getting in trouble with the police.
- Do not send back everything your ex gave you. Your ex will not stop stalking you and you will no longer have material to provide to the police in case of need.
- Some people may accuse you of still chasing your ex. Find an opportunity to show that you don't want to know anything and that it's just a misunderstanding.
